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The White Sox Report

By Ricky O’Donnell

If it’s Opening Day for the White Sox, that can only mean one thing: C.C. Sabathia and Cleveland Indians. For the fourth consecutive season, the Sox and Indians square off in their season openers; for the third consecutive season, Sabathia will be on the mound for the Tribe. His career record versus the Sox is 14-3.
Opening Days are just one game, but they are often revelatory. In 2005, the Sox snuck by Cleveland 1-0, with the immortal Shingo Takatsu – frisbee pitch and all – recording the final out. Few would have guessed that 1-0 would also be the score of the Sox’s final game that season, a win over Houston to secure the World Series.
In 2006, the White Sox pounded Cleveland 10-4. The rest of that season would characterized by their explosive offense, with four players hitting over 30 home runs – even though a 90-win season was only good enough to finish third in the mighty AL Central that year.
And then there was the 12-5 beat-down Cleveland handed the White Sox to open the season last year. The Sox went on to lose 90 games.
So watch the opener closely and we’ll get a good idea if Ozzie Guillen will have to make good on his promise (threat?) to run naked down Michigan Avenue if the Sox win the World Series.


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Week in Review: The Sox went 2-5 down the stretch to compile the worst spring training record in the AL at 11-19.
Week in Preview: It’s three in Cleveland and three in Detroit as the Sox find out early how much distance there is between them and the division favorites.
Center Stage: Alexei Ramirez is slated to start in center on Opening Day, but he’s only keeping the spot warm for . . . Nick Swisher, Jerry Owens, Brian Anderson and probably a couple others who will audition this season, with no single player getting the starring role.
Cell Stem Research: Beachwood Labs has determined that The Cell still sucks.
Fields on the Farm: You know, he’s only a career .280 hitter down there.
Jose Can You See: Ozzie says Jose Contreras “might be the key to the season.” He’s not allowed to drive the car at night, though.
The Missile Tracker: Hey, he said it, not us.
That’s Ozzie: “He won’t be the key,” he said, changing his mind about Contreras.
Over/Under: How long into the season it takes for Sox fans to complain that the Cubs get more attention: one-millionth of a second after the first pitch.
Beachwood Sabermetrics:A complex algorithm performed by the The Cub Factor staff using all historical data made available by Major League Baseball has determined that it will be a long season if Jose Contreras is the key.

Ricky O’Donnell is the proprietor of Tremendous Upside Potential.

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Posted on March 31, 2008