The [Monday] Papers

By Steve Rhodes

“[This is] not a day for dancing in the streets” but for “reflection,” suburban congressman Peter Roskam told WLS-AM this morning.
I have to agree. The scenes of folks chanting “USA! USA!” and cadets at West Point singing the national anthem make me uncomfortable.

On the other hand, a little humor can’t hurt.

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Osama’s Obit
“He was born to privilege, one of more than 50 offspring of Saudi Arabia’s wealthiest construction magnate,” John-Thor Dahlburg and Alex Rodriguez write for Tribune. “He spent his youth in air-conditioned mansions filled with crystal chandeliers, gold statues and Italian tapestries.
“Yet when death came to Osama bin Laden, it was not far from the Afghan border, the laboratory of global terrorism that had protected him from America’s pursuit for the nearly 10 years since the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks that he was accused of helping plot.
“And it was Afghanistan – the remote and starkly beautiful Central Asian land – that played a decisive role in his 54 years of life. There, the well-born Arab evolved into a religious fanatic and learned the theology and practice of jihad.
“There, the exiled Saudi became the architect and paymaster of a far-flung, sophisticated and devastatingly effective terrorist organization – al-Qaeda.”
Liveblogging Bin Laden
“A computer programmer, startled by a helicopter clattering above his quiet Pakistani town in the early hours of the morning Monday, did what any social-media addict would do: he began sending messages to the social networking site Twitter,” AP reports.
“With his tweets, 33-year-old Sohaib Athar, who moved to the sleepy town of Abbottabad to escape the big city, became in his own words ‘the guy who liveblogged the Osama raid without knowing it.'”
Jobs Sobs
“As few as 25 percent of 16- to 19-year-olds are likely to be employed this summer, part of a decades-long trend of declines in teen summer employment, according to a report to be released today at the Chicago Urban League,” the Sun-Times reports. “By comparison, 45 percent of teens had summer employment in 2000, a study by Northeastern University’s Center for Labor Market Studies found.”
We are a stupid nation.
Bugging Blago
“It was the fall of 2008 when an Illinois State Police technician was inside of Rod Blagojevich’s North Side campaign office under orders from Blagojevich’s camp to search for bugs,” the Sun-Times reports.
“The tech left the office telling Blagojevich’s people that no listening devices were found.
“But the bugs were, in fact, in place, the FBI was listening, and the State Police employee even knew where they were. He pretended not to detect them.
“That’s because the Illinois State Police, the agency charged with protecting Blagojevich and his family, was at the same time secretly working with the FBI, providing them with inside information during a critical period of the probe against the former governor.”
Pool Party
“After the government asked Zagel to dismiss an unemployed man who said he spends his days watching reruns of The Beverly Hillbillies and who struggled to express himself during his interview, defense attorney Sheldon Sorosky bristled,” AP reports.
“In the end, Zagel dismissed the man on the grounds that he ‘seems to be entirely detached from reality.'”
So, a peer as a juror.
Governor Gumby
“Since his inauguration for a full term Jan. 10, Gov. Pat Quinn has spent 12 days in Springfield, according to a review of his publicly released schedule,” GateHouse News reports.
Wow, that’s only 12 days more than me.
Roeper Doeper
“If you ask someone how she first heard about bin Laden’s death, she’ll likely say it was via a text message from a friend – or she found out via Twitter or Facebook. This, we’re told, is further evidence ‘old media’ is dead and social media rules the day,” Richard Roeper writes.
Really? Is this what we’re told?
“But when someone Tweeted or Facebooked the news about U.S. forces killing bin Laden, was that person actually breaking the news – or simply using social media to repeat the story they’d heard from someone else, who’d heard it from mainstream media.”
Um, duh. Do you think anyone really believes “Facebook” breaks news like this?
In fact, I found out about bin Laden’s death via Facebook. Then I e-mailed a friend. Then I turned on the TV. Finally, I logged onto the Internet and read the news online.
I think everyone understands that Facebook is largely – though not wholly – a distribution method for news. Just like most newspapers. After all, the Sun-Times didn’t break the news either. So what’s the difference?
PR Fills Vacuum
Propaganda Nation.
Media Toasts Royalty
History is such a drag.
Finally Below Average
Now we can get real about the Cubs.
The Ex-Sox Factor
Not pretty.
Bulls and Bears
Ascendant.
I Am A Security Guard
And he is a coke dealer.
The Weekend in Chicago Rock
You shoulda been there.
Programming Note
I’ll be back behind the bar at the venerable Beachwood Inn tonight, and The Chicago Code will be back too.

While Teresa and Jarek set the stage for their case against Alderman Gibbons, their effort to clean up Chicago takes an unexpected turn when a deadlocked jury acquits a corrupt city official. Suspicious, the two mount an investigation, only to discover that jury tampering is just the tip of the iceberg.

We’ll also have the Bulls against the Hawks and, of course, the world’s greatest jukebox. Stop in and exchange witty banter with Beachwood contributors and bar regulars. 5 p.m. to 2 a.m.
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The Beachwood Tip Line: Tamper-proof.

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Posted on May 2, 2011