Chicago - A message from the station manager

The [Friday] Papers

By Steve Rhodes

“Pepsi agreed to change labels on its Aquafina bottled water to show it comes from municipal taps,” the Sun-Times notes in a brief business item today. “Pepsi will spell out ‘Public Water Source’ on bottles of Aquafina, the largest U.S. bottled-water brand, after pressure from an advocacy group that said the snow-capped mountains on the bottle implied the source was spring water.
“Aquafina’s label currently reads, ‘Bottled at the Source P.W.S.,’ which stands for the public water sources. Aquafina is bottled in several U.S. cities.'”


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According to Wikipedia, Aquafina “is standard tap water but goes through an extensive purification process that includes charcoal filtration, reverse osmosis and ozonation.”
1. There’s charcoal in our tap water?
2. The reverse osmosis is a marketing technique that occurs in the grocery aisle.
3. Ozonation occurs when the water is exposed to air.
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“Aquafina uses PepsiCo’s own purification system, which it calls HydRO-7.”
See, that’s why I prefer the Coca-Cola’s counterpart, Dasani, which uses HydRO-8. Why cheat your customers out of a HydRO?
GROANER: Spinal Tap uses HydRO-11.
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“Aquafina is an official sponsor of Olympus Fashion Week.”
Yes. It is Fashion Week’s Official Breakfast and Lunch.
Aquacocaina is the Official Dinner.
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“PepsiCo produces several other products under the Aquafina label:
– Aquafina Sparkling, carbonated flavoured water, available in Berry Blast (Raspberry), and Citrus Twist.
– Aquafina FlavorSplash, flavoured water (without carbonation), available in Grape, Citrus Blend, Wild Berry, and Raspberry.
– Aquafina Alive, a low calorie, vitamin-enhanced water beverage, available in Berry Pomegranate, Peach Mango and Orange Lime.”
Coming Soon: Aquafina Mercury, a sludge-enhanced flavoured water with fuel additives and a clouty kick available in BP Twist and Indiana Green Tea.
And Aquapedia will allow users to add their own ingredients prior to drinking.
Book Patrol
Real library trustees don’t need no stinkin’ badges.
Best Library Cop Ever
“Well, let me tell you something, funny boy. You know that little stamp that says New York Public Library? Well that may not mean anything to you but that means a lot to me, one whole hell of a lot.”
Lt. Bookman
Character Study
Minor in name only.
Ad Man
The best advertisement I’ve seen yet for AMC’s Mad Men is Lewis Lazare’s pan today in the Sun-Times. Give it a read and tell me you can’t wait for the next episode!
Kiss Off
Then again, Lazare doesn’t like the new Dunkin’ Donuts ad because he finds it unrealistic that “anybody with half a brain would think to employ [Kiss guitar player Ace] Frehley in an office job to begin with. Which is why this disjointed, hopelessly heavy-handed commercial simply doesn’t work.”
He’s also troubled that “It tries to juxtapose Frehley with a perfectly pleasant looking female office worker who looks to be giving a board room presentation. We see very little of her and her presentation, however, while we are treated to way too much of Frehley’s showy guitar riff as the buttoned down corporate executives look on.”
Yes, show us more board room presentation and less guitar!
Hey Lew, stop trying to impress the Tribune.
Our Tribune
“But it was a controversial decision in 1990 that sensitized editors about considering race, ethnicity and class, as well as rethinking the role of pop culture on the front page,” the Tribune’s public editor, Timothy McNulty, writes today.
Until 1990, the Trib didn’t consider race, ethnicity, class or pop culture when considering what stories it put on the front page!
“That day both Jim Henson, creator of the Muppets, and singer Sammy Davis Jr. died. Jack Fuller, then editor of the paper, decided to place Henson’s photo and obituary on the front beside a photo of Davis that referred readers to his obituary inside the paper.
“Fuller later wrote in a book titled News Values that while Davis was “the first black entertainer to present himself publicly as the social equal of white entertainers,” he believed that Henson was more significant as a seminal figure in the evolution of television as an educational force.”
If Fuller were black, or more enlightened, he might have seen Davis instead as a black Jew of a Puerto Rican mother accepted by a New Jersey Italian and his pack of infamous Hollywood lounge rats as not only an equal as an artist but as a friend whose symbolism of the meritocratic melting pot of America was so great he was used in one of the all-time classic sitcom episodes on the groundbreaking All in the Family.
Plus, he was The Candy Man.
Henson wasn’t even one of the puppets!
(Yes, that’s Sammy doing a loose Moonwalk 42 seconds in.)
Hiring Freeze
“Mayor Daley has said for the last three years that he does not know who appointed [Angelo] Torres to head the Hired Truck Program,” the Sun-Times notes today.
He’s filed a Freedom of Information request with the city but they aren’t complying.
Dot-Com Bomb
Capitalizing on the success of the debate it co-sponsored with YouTube, CNN announced this morning that the CNN/Google Debate is next.
Questions will be solicited from citizen searches, excluding cached versions and supplemental results.
Prosecutorial Discretion
After appearing with Todd Stroger on Chicago Tonight last night, Cook County State’s Attorney Dick Devine said he would no longer meet with rogue dictators looking to score propaganda points without preconditions.
That’s Todd!
“The problem with the media is that they report on issues but they don’t have all the facts,” Stroger said on the show.
No, really. He said that. It’s not a punch line.
And then he stonewalled about the budget.
I kid you not.
Obama vs. Clinton
Rival campaign spokesmen David Axelrod and Howard Wolfson were up and down the cable dial yesterday. Decide for yourself, without prejudice.
Annoying Advice
Track your symptoms and see if Yaz is right for you.
Site Bite
The Tribune’s new website is so powder-puffy. Plus, they seemed to have removed the news. But the ads sure pop out.
The Beachwood Tip Line: You can even eat the dishes.

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Posted on July 27, 2007