By Marty Gangler
Just when we thought it was safe to not care.
Just when you were going to trade in your fungoes for hockey sticks.
Just when you thought you would spend a little more time in the backyard this summer.
Just then, the Cubs go ahead and win for a week.
Don’t get me wrong, this doesn’t mean they are back in it. But it’s enough to have to keep tuning in.
Three more of these weeks and you’re going to have to pay attention the whole summer.
I don’t think that’s going to happen, but there are a few things this season that I didn’t think would happen.
They say a blind squirrel can still find a nut and maybe this is what happened this week.
But seriously, how many people have ever seen a blind squirrel? A blind squirrel is not going to last long. They can’t dodge traffic, know when to jump to the next tree branch, or stay far enough away from that kid next door that really isn’t “all there.”
So the Cubs aren’t a blind squirrel. They are a well-fed, poorly conditioned, annoying squirrel that can dance. And who is not going to watch a fat squirrel dance, for at least a little while?
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Week in Review: The Cubs won five of seven, squashing a lot of fans’ plans to not watch the 2010 season anymore.
Week in Preview: The Cubs come home for three games against both the Dodgers and Cardinals. With expectations back on the rise, expect to be angry at this team again by Thursday.
The Second Basemen Report: Six starts by new second basemanRyan Theriot this week and one by old second baseman Mike Fontenot. It seems the new, rock-solid starting second baseman is guy who was supposed to be the rock-solid starting second baseman two years ago. This only means that two years from now, Mike Fontenot will be the rock-solid second baseman. You know, just like Jim Hendry drew it up.
In former second basemen news, Jeff Baker, who used to be in the second-base mix this year, started in right field for the Cubs on Wednesday. He is missed, at second base.
The Zam Bomb: Will Big Z simulate anger during his simulated game? He may be returning to the rotation, but he’s still getting angry.
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Lost in Translation: Cubbieo no no watchy is Japanese for The Hawks are in the Cup.
Endorsement No-Brainer: Carlos Silva for not working out.
Sweet and Sour Lou: 30% sweet, 70% sour. Lou is up five points on the Sweet-O-Meter this week due to winning baseball, yet not as high as he should be due to the Cubs acquiring Bobby Howry. And just like your real crazy drunk uncle, Lou is happy you are making something of yourself and that you are moving into a nice house, but why did you invite your cousin Ray to come help move? He’s going to at least break a lamp and will probably drink all the beer, and that is going to really bug Lou.
Ameritrade Stock Pick of the Week: Shares of junk bonds are in fashion this week.
Over/Under: The number of batters faced before Bobby Howry gets booed: +/- .5
Beachwood Sabermetrics: A complex algorithm performed by the The Cub Factor staff using all historical data made available by Major League Baseball has determined that Bobby Howry is a bad idea.
Agony & Ivy: It’s a way of life.
The Cub Factor: Unlike Soriano, you can catch ’em all!
The White Sox Report: Now with a weekly Cubs Snub.
Fantasy Fix: The season’s biggest underachiever is neither Cub nor Sock.
The Mount Lou Alert System: Moves to yellow as cool winning steam breezes lower the core temperature of Mount Lou. But someone needs to clean up the place, Mount Lou looks terrible.
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Posted on May 24, 2010