Chicago - A message from the station manager

LiLo vs. Blago

By The Beachwood Vs. Affairs Desk

Compare and contrast.
LiLo: Cried first night in prison.
Blago: Will cry every night in prison.
Lilo: Got to keep her extensions.
Blago: Will get to keep his extensions.
LiLo: Cornered by the Sisters in the laundry.
Blago: Will be cornered by the Sisters in the laundry.
LiLo: Dated Sam Ronson.
Blago: Hired Sam Adams.
LiLo: Had a talking car.
Blago: Talked too much.


LiLo: Gets paid $400,000 to take her clothes off.
Blago: Spends $400,000 to put clothes on.
LiLo: Did her nails just for court.
Blago: Will do nails for parole hearing.
LiLo: Redhead.
Blago: Bedhead.
LiLo: Can’t believe how unfair the world is.
Blago: Can’t believe how unfair the world is.
LiLo: Refuses to speak to her father.
Blago: Refuses to speak to his father-in-law.
LiLo: Known to be a psychologically unstable drug user.
Blago: Is just psychologically unstable.
LiLo: Acted in A Prairie Home Companion.
Blago: Alleges a Prairie State conspiracy.
LiLo: Hopes to make it to premiere of Machete.
Blago: Hopes to make a machete out of his toothbrush.
LiLo: Mean Girl.
Blago: Mean Governor.
LiLo: Swings both ways.
Blago: About to swing both ways.
LiLo: Her career is in the toilet.
Blago: Spent most of his career hiding in the toilet.
LiLo: Had a career that was fucking golden.
Blago: Had a Senate seat that was fucking golden.
– Andrew Reilly, Drew Adamek, Steve Rhodes
Comments welcome.

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Posted on July 29, 2010