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Exclusive! Rahm Budget Preview

Another Beachwood Special Report

“Mayor Rahm Emanuel plans to balance next year’s budget by asking smokers and cable TV customers to pay more, cutting spending and hoping that a rosier economy will fill city coffers with more tax dollars,” the Tribune reports.
“The picture of what the mayor will say Wednesday when he delivers his annual budget address to the Chicago City Council emerged as top aides briefed aldermen behind closed doors Tuesday.”
The Beachwood has learned Rahm will propose the following measures:


* Doubling the amusement tax to make it twice as expensive to be amused in Chicago.
* Increasing the tax on cable TV by 50 percent for all users, with an additional 10 percent surcharge on all viewers of the Real Housewives franchise.
* A new $1 fee every time you start your car.
* A new $1 tax on every new tax.
* A new $100 school-closing fee to be imposed on every resident living within the boundaries of a closed school.
* A new $100 welcoming-school fee to be imposed on every resident living within the boundaries of a welcoming school.
* Black light cameras using infrared technology will start scanning the inside of vehicles at stop signs and send out $100 tickets to those whose interiors are a mess.
* A new real estate transfer fee to be charged to whichever party in a sale has the fewest degrees of separation to the mayor.
* A 75-cent-per-pack increase in the cigarette tax, accompanied by a new 10-cent tax on every match struck and a 20-cent tax on every lighter lit aflame.
* Meet new chief financial officer Kevin Trudeau.
* Cubs will now be charged $100 for every error.
* A $100,000 tax assessed to every “No” vote in the city council.

Comments welcome.

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Posted on October 23, 2013