By Larry Horist
There once was a Mayor named Rich
A kids museum was his pitch
A tall building in Grant
Is something you shan’t
So he put all the kids in a ditch
*
They wanted to put kids in a museum
Below the ground where no one could see ’em
Allstate was hyper
To pay the town piper
But the critics fought back ad nauseam
*
Allstate said they needed more fame
In Grant Park they wanted their name
Fifteen million is small
For breaking the law
And putting their good hands all to shame
*
There once was Montgomery Ward
In his store he got awfully bored
Protecting Grant Park
Was to be his great mark
He was driven by a civic accord
*
A new museum for kids is a thrill
But in Grant Park the plan is a pill
The people say “No”
The Mayor says, “So?”
The council is voting my will
*
Richie and Gigi traveled in Paree
said “A Monument to Pritzker is what we’d like to see”
We’ll call it a museum
But build a mausoleum
And let Allstate have a prominent marquee
*
There once was an Alderman named Reilly
Who dared tell the mayor ever so shyly
“Your museum in Grant
Is causing a rant”
To poor wily Reilly the Mayor so slyly is no longer
smiley
*
Gigi of the Pritzkers is the one
Her plan for a museum is not fun
She’ll build it in Grant Park
Even after dark
Because that’s how Chicago is run
*
There once was a museum at the Pier
For kids, it was without any beers
The mayor said “No”
To Grant Park you will go
With enough liquor for all of our “cheers”
*
At the Pier, the museum was a dream
It was great for Chicago’s esteem
But the public got sicker
As the plot got thicker
And they discovered Grant Park was the scheme
*
There once was a mayor name Richie
Who’s love for the “kids” was real kitschy
But when the public said “No”!
To a museum sunk low
It made Kitschy Richie quite Bitchy
*
There once was a Burnham named Dan
Who for Chicago had a great plan
He said Grant Park should be
ever open, clear and free
And to fight for that cause, if we can
*
The museum at Navy Pier was no lark
But the mayor said move to Grant Park
When the people said “can’t”
To a bunker in Grant
The Mayor got so angry he lost his train of thought
and grumbled and mumbled
about a lot of things that didn’t make any sense
Posted on April 30, 2008