Chicago - A message from the station manager

The Week in WTF

By David Rutter

1. Joe Walsh, WTF?
In a legislative body occasionally comprised of crooks, pedophiles and nincompoops, it takes some astounding level of moral decay to be the worst of the lot. But we think this guy qualifies, not perhaps as the worst legislator because he hasn’t really done anything, but the actual worst human being. He is the Worst Human Being in the U.S. House of Representatives.
You all know who this guy is. He’s loud, obnoxious, arrogant, never picks up a check, eats all your food when he visits, steals your monogrammed towels, lectures you interminably about how he is smarter than you are. And he’s resiliently unemployed. Yes, it’s your brother-in-law.

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Posted on July 29, 2011

Chicagoetry: The Drowning

By J.J. Tindall

The Drowning
I wish I could write a poem
as profound as a first drop of rain–
tiny gong–
in a short summer shower.
No thunder, just the polite applause
for humidity breaking. One drop,
as shadows melt,
which says quietly but authoritatively
“It is raining.”
It is raining.

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Posted on July 26, 2011

Painting Chicago and Indiana

Uploaded to YouTube by ishrock

“Painting in Chicago (Milwaukee Fullerton) and Painting in Indiana (Roman Villareal’s Studio) AKA the Concrete Jungle. Peace to all the artists in the video.”

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Posted on July 25, 2011

I Am A Security Guard: Goodbye

By Jerome Haller

About two years ago, I completed the company’s job application. A human resources staffer liked what he read and asked me to stop by the store on a Saturday afternoon.
I did not keep the appointment. Instead, I called in a fake ankle injury and spent the day competing in a softball tournament. Besides, I had a temp office gig at an advertising firm and figured I could coast with that for a spell.
That was a bad assumption. A few days later, a supervisor unceremoniously canned me.
While suffering shock, I stumbled to the Harold Washington Library to search for another job. I nearly cried while thinking about my arrogance and stupidity. I logged onto a computer to peek at jobs on Craigslist, hoping for a miracle.
Someone must have prayed for me that day. A miracle did take place. Within minutes, my cell phone rang. The same staffer who liked me had called back. He asked me to stop by the store the next day. I jumped at the opportunity as though it were the last lifeboat on the Titanic.
During a brief chat in the main office, he told me the job paid minimum wage and required me to stand for eight hours on third shift. I gladly accepted. He gave me a schedule. I arrived for work two days later, meeting Pitbull, and plunged into retail security.

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Posted on July 17, 2011

The Week in WTF

By David Rutter

1. ComEd, WTF?
Chicago might have the cultural ambience of Paris, but it has the electrical system of Mogadishu.
Does it not seem as though the effects of every summer storm are regarded by ComEd as inexplicable acts of fate? Actually, no. They claim to have everything under control.
Only a month ago, ComEd issued this pay-no-attention-to-the-man-behind-the-curtain press release containing a highly amusing interlude:

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Posted on July 15, 2011

I Am a Security Guard: Rest In Peace

A strange man started coming into the store late at night. A burly, tall guy, he wore the dirty jacket and pants of a laborer. Despite his youthful face, he usually looked quite tired. He often wandered around the store touching merchandise. That raised a red flag, so I watched him.
He also shot the breeze with the Nice Cashier. After I had seen this a few nights, I pulled her aside and asked if he made her uncomfortable. She said no. They knew each other because both lived near the store.
He continued talking with the Nice Cashier until the store fired her. Afterward, he occasionally showed up with his girlfriend and their daughter. I never greeted him because I never shook my initial impression.
A tragic event changed my view.

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Posted on July 14, 2011

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