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What I Watched Last Night

Listen to this: There are a few people out there who have super-human powers, and their powers vary from one to another. They live unsuccessful lives and are dealt hardship after hardship. They are always trying to do the most for humankind but never seem to get proper credit. They are almost always hated by society and put into roles that are unfair.

This is the synopsis of the first of many shows that will not be cancelled in their first week. The show is called Heroes, and it is NBC's answer to Dancing With the Stars. NBC ran this show last night for the second time to see if it would play a little better this time around. (Note to NBC: Please credit Dusty Baker and his reliance on Ryan Dempster as closer when referring to this strategy.)

This show is really bad. Not like Titus bad, because that show had its moments. This show is in a league of its own.

I watched maybe 10 to 15 minutes of Heroes and I have reached the season finale in my head already. The super-human "heroes" will face some type of governmental investigation into them in mid-season just as they realize who they each are. They will band together with some sort of scientist who speaks with a German accent and he keeps them safe somewhere in his fancy mansion, most likely in on an underground level. The scientist will then encourage them to go out and do some good for all humankind, like a Captain Planet sort of thing. This is the point where costumes will be debated in the writers' room and the marketing department will stop by for a visit. The German scientist will now serve as a father figure to all the "heroes," and they will admire him.

Toward the end of the season, an evil faction of super-human people that will arise and try to kill the "heroes" and spread fear amongst the regular humans. They may be called Republicans. This will happen just in time for a two-hour season finale where the "heroes" and the villains square off and the German scientist is either killed or captured. I would bet on captured in order to keep him around just in case he made for good rating - and a toy tie-in with Burger King.

So there you have it, the first season of Heroes on NBC. Now let's hope this terrible show is taken off the air since we already know what is going to happen and there's no reason to actually be forced to live through it.




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Posted on September 27, 2006


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