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Red Carpet Recap

By Bethany Lankin
"Oscar Presenter" is one of the more than 20 whole-body plastinates featured in the BODY WORLDS exhibit. While walking the red carpet, the Oscar Presenter demonstrates the movement between the superficial and intermediate layers of muscles. Gwyneth Paltrow demonstrates.

Posted on February 27, 2007

What I Watched Last Night

By Scott Buckner
A family that harvests deer piss exchanges mothers with the Princess Party set, in a heartwarming tale of the American melting pot of the world's psychoses.

Posted on February 27, 2007

What I Watched Last Night - Oscar Edition

By Scott Buckner
This was a night that totally begged for the astutely rude commentary we've come to expect and enjoy in the past from Kathy Griffin on E!'s Live From The Red Carpet. Instead we got a snootful of Ryan Seacrest, setting the tone for the evening.

Posted on February 26, 2007

"I Want To Thank God And My Manicurist"

By Kathryn Ware
William Monahan (The Departed) speaks for everyone in the room when he says, "Valium does work." Another piece of paper comes out from the coat pocket and the reading of names begins. Shouldn't writers give better speeches?

Posted on February 26, 2007

Oscar Geeks

By Marilyn Ferdinand
Hostesses for the Sci-Tech Oscars have included Charlize Theron, Scarlett Johansson, Salma Hayek, and Kate Hudson.

Posted on February 25, 2007

Zola Levitt

A recent show began with a slow motion montage of ancient warriors and modern paratroopers, tanks, and WWII footage, accompanied by what appeared to be the NFL theme song

Posted on February 25, 2007

What I Watched Last Night

Ed spends the second-best part of the movie finding out how fucking heavy and awkward a dead body wrapped in a rug actually is, and what a chore getting one from Point A to Point B can be without the helpful advice and assistance of Harvey Keitel.

Posted on February 20, 2007

Michael Thurmond's Six-Day Body Makeover

A huge spread of fat-people photos becomes a collage American flag.

Posted on February 20, 2007

What I Watched Last Night

NASCAR is an inescapable television fact every Sunday afternoon between February and November, so you have to figure out how to deal with it.

Posted on February 19, 2007

Sonic Blade

Apocalyptic Omens: "We need to put Sonic Blades in as many hands as possible!" "If you've got some cutting to do, you need power!"

Posted on February 18, 2007

What I Watched Last Night

By Scott Buckner
After my second shot of Sambuca, I can't seem to get this thought out of my head: What the fuck is up with Oprah's hair?

Posted on February 14, 2007

Weasel Scales Olympus: The Fred Asparagus Saga

By The Beachwood Charactor Actor Affairs Desk
Dockhand - Slappy and the Stinkers (1998).

Posted on February 13, 2007

JUST IN: Obama Speaks

By The Beachwood Rock Star Affairs Desk
JUST IN: Obama Fired Up.

Posted on February 10, 2007

Acne Complex

"It makes them disappear completely - it's almost magic!"

Posted on February 9, 2007

What I Watched Last Night

The world's strongest men carrying a 900-pound Yugos on their shoulders. The world's baddest girls spank a lot of wet, naked ass.

Posted on February 7, 2007

What I Watched Last Night

By Scott Buckner
David Spade doesn't even have to open his whiny little mouth to annoy the living piss out of everyone.

Posted on February 5, 2007

What I Watched Last Night

By Scott Buckner
Sales rep Jim Halpert wants nothing to do with renting a male stripper, so he rents a Ben Franklin impersonator from some Pennsylvania scholastic society instead, and lots of hilarity ensues.

Posted on February 2, 2007

MUSIC - The Weekend In Chicago Rock.
TV - Time For Royal Scroungers To Earn Their Keep.
POLITICS - More College Aid Going To The Rich.
SPORTS - Bears At Peak McCaskey.

BOOKS - Before Breitbart.

PEOPLE PLACES & THINGS - Chicagoetry: New Fucking Frying Pan.


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