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The White Sox Report

So Sox brass is upset with the team's performance, and that's all well and good, what with the whole "don't lose control of your club" thing generally being an admirable way to run a ballclub.


The thing is, when this is over, the heads that roll will probably not be those of the Mark Teahens and Randy Williamses of the world. Those players in particular may go but we will see again what we have seen before. They'll bring in fresh cannon fodder and wonder why the guy with a history of terrible fielding can't contribute defensively. They'll build a bullpen out of swiss cheese and wonder out loud why no lead is safe. They'll stock up on guys of dubious offensive merit and wonder why the bats can only deliver just enough runs to lose.

On the plus side, their newly-acquired ace is well on the road to becoming a great six-inning pitcher and two-thirds of the new outfield could finish first and second in comeback player of the year awards; I hesitate to throw "MVP" out there because teams this bad tend to not produce players of serious consideration in that category.

So with that, they brace for showdowns with three models of everything the Sox are doing wrong. The Angels' player development and clinics in fundamentals showing how to lay down bunts that aren't popped up and how to advance runners beyond second base. The Tigers showing how much fun you can have when your owner is crazy enough to not care about losing money. The Marlins giving a veritable master class on drafting and how to really win on the cheap, rather than just filling in the gaps with low-rent second-tier players.

And yes, it's easy to envy those teams just because they're winning more often than the Sox, but that's exactly the point; the Sox have some stuff going for them, but they're not winning. Ever. They are losing series to everyone. Their longest winning streak is three games. They have not emerged victorious in consecutive games since April 23, 24, and 25. They have reached a level of sadness only a select few clubs normally reach, the Sox now having more in common with the Orioles and Royals of the world than with anyone any fan would want their favorite team to emulate, but it's like the wise man said: if you listen to fools, the mob rules.


Week in Review: Useless. Splitting a pair with the Twins was cool, but dropping two of three to the Royals negated the whole endeavor.

Week in Preview: Mini-serious. A two-parter in the Ruins of Detroit, followed by a two-game set at home against the Angels and a three-nighter with the Marlins.

Hawkeroo's Can-O-Corn Watch: "Mike Scioscia, I tell you, that was a guy who'd hit .260, that was a .260 that would go 4-for-4, day in and day out, and to see that kind of baseball mind at work over in that dugout, you can read it in his eyes when he's thinking, 'Alright, let's get a hit here,' or 'It's a 2-1 count, here comes that big ol' hook and hammer.' And that, I've seen that in three other catchers: Carlton Fisk had it, our own A.J. Pierzynski definitely has it, and Ron Karkovice. And any of those three, I tell you, those guys can change a game. You could put Karko out there right now and he'd still go 1-for-3, maybe 2-for-5 or even 6-for-7 if he wanted. Because that's what great players do."

Gordon Beckham Hall of Fame Update: Active hitting streak, Albert Pujols: two games. Active hitting streak, Gordon Beckham: three games. Advantage: Beckham.

Alumni News You Can Use: Former White Sox bust prospect Jon Rauch currently sits in a tie for second-most saves in the American League with 10 while former South Side Superman Jose Contreras recorded his first career save Saturday for the Phillies against the Brewers.

The "H" in "DH" Stands For: Heating up. Omar Vizquel continued his ascent, going 1-for-4 Friday night against the Royals and raising his average to an almost Pierzynskian .143.

The Q Factor: Carlos Quentin missed the entire series in Kansas City due to a mysterious stomach ailment. Preliminary reports from TCQ labs suggest Quentin may have ingested the partially rotten skull of Royals pitching prospect and former White Sox Hall of Fame outfielder Brian Anderson. He is expected back in the lineup for the Detroit series.

The Guillen Meter: As we wake up to a world without Ronnie James Dio, the Guillen Meter reads "6.66." Some sabbaths are blacker than others.

Endorsement No-Brainer: White Sox baserunning for the 1992 Chevrolet Silverado: like a rock.

Cubs Snub: You know your team sucks when game recaps show off the timely hitting and outstanding defense of the Pittsburgh Pirates.

The White Sox Report: Read 'em all.

The Cub Factor: It's funny because it's true.


The White Sox Report welcomes your comments.


Andrew Reilly is the managing editor of The 35th Street Review and a contributor to many fine publications.

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