Subscribe to the Newsletter

The Hester Man Can!

Everyone can sing along with this one, Bears fans.

The Hester Man


Who can take a kickoff
Run it back in record time
Make you leave your jock strap
On the 50-yard line

Devin Hester can
Devin Hester can
Devin Hester can 'cause he mixes dekes and jukes and makes the Bears seem good

Who can be a decoy
Line up wide or in the slot
Who's risking injury
8 catches all he's got

Devin Hester can
Devin Hester can
Devin Hester can 'cause he's leaping a defender, giving Bears fans wood

Devin Hester shakes
Devin Hester bakes
His kick returns are so delicious
His preparation is meticulous
Joniak calls him ridiculous

Who passed Gayle Sayers
McKinnon and Gentry
In his second season
More returns than McAfee

Devin Hester can
Devin Hester can
Devin Hester can with his speed and stutter steps he makes the Bears seem good

Devin Hester's quick
Devin Hester's sick
His punt returns are really vicious
With Sauerbrun he was malicious
His mom thinks Campbell soup's delicious

Who can't save the season
Even though he's great
The Bears are in the toilet
Best they'll do is 8-8

Devin Hester can't
Devin Hester can't
Devin Hester can't but let him play some defense, maybe then he could


- Tom Latourette, Steve Rhodes, Marty Gangler


Special thanks to the Croix Nation Haylushka Indian Princesses.


Also from Beachwood A/V:

- "Cubs Fans: Please Stop Believin'"
- "Oklouhoma" and "Ozzie Cabana"
- "Dusty Must Get Fired"
- "I Had a Crush On Obama"
- "I"m the Tribune/I'm the Sun-Times"
- "Tap Three Times: The Larry Craig Song"

Plus, new YouTube video including "It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Hanukah."

More from Beachwood Sports »

Unused Rental Cars Parked At Baseball Stadiums

Thursday was supposed to be opening day for Major League Baseball, but stadiums are empty, with the season postponed due to the coronavirus outbreak. Instead, parking lots are being used to store unused rental vehicles.

Continue reading "Unused Rental Cars Parked At Baseball Stadiums" »

Posted on Mar 28, 2020

The White Sox Report

An Opening Day Requiem

Someday there will be another one, and when it arrives, the emotions, joy and hopes will burst forth possibly like never before. May we all be here to add it to our Opening Day memories.

Continue reading "An Opening Day Requiem" »

Posted on Mar 27, 2020

Missing Chicago's Game

Sure, the Bears are Chicago's team, but if basketball wasn't number one in Chicago before the '90s, the glorious run of Michael Jordan's six-time champ Bulls made it so.

Continue reading "Missing Chicago's Game" »

Posted on Mar 25, 2020