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The College Football Report Top Ten: Army Training, Sir!

1. Army recruits.

Army football recruits, that is. No doubt the Army doesn't take out regular grunts on a party bus as part of the recruiting pitch.

The Colorado Springs Gazette obtained documents showing that Army "wooed recruits this year with an alcohol-fueled party, a dinner date with female cadets, cash from boosters and VIP treatment on a party bus complete with cheerleaders and a police escort."

The bus dropped the future cadets at a local bowling alley, where the party began in earnest. After a few frames and more than a few beers, the cheerleaders aboard the bus reportedly spiced up the ride back with some girl-on-girl action.

While some have decried the lack of NCAA involvement in penalizing the recruiting offenses, we imagine the team took care of business just fine in-house. The cadets involved "appeared before the Commandant's Disciplinary Board" and were "dealt with harshly."

From this point forward, we're replacing cliches such as "taken behind the woodshed" with "appeared before the Commandant." We can only imagine.

5. Minnesota kickers.

Maybe the Gophers should ramp up the practice routine. Just a thought.

11. LSU.

LSU upset #3 Ole Miss in front of 102,312 Tiger faithful in Death Valley. The Rebels drew a delay of game penalty while lining up for a game-tying field goal in the final seconds, ruining any hope of an overtime comeback. Ole Miss elected to try a Hail Mary instead, resulting in an interception with one second remaining at the 2-yard line.

Life just isn't fair.


19. Michigan State.

A superfan for the #5 Spartans flew over the field Saturday trailing a banner reading "U OF M - KEEP BRADY HOKE - PLZZZ." Michigan State rolled the 3-4 Wolverines, adding a late touchdown to spite the visitors for planting a spear (or a tire iron, or something) in the field during Michigan's pregame antics.

31. Brad Doughty.

Some guy you've never heard of lit up Old Dominion on Saturday. Quarterback Brad Doughty led Western Kentucky, a CFR favorite, to a 66-51 win in a game that saw him break WKU records for passing yards (now at 2,871) and touchdowns (now 24) in a single-season. Who did he surpass? Brad Doughty. In both categories. You could say the guy is having a pretty good year.

57. Fort Worth Fireworks.

TCU exhausted the fireworks supply at Amon G. Carter Stadium during a 82-27 rout over Texas Tech. We can only imagine that the proprietor of Fort Worth Fireworks, "The absolute closest place to the City to buy Fireworks!," loved seeing that final score.

99. Technical difficulties.

Blown calls and technical issues marred the Ohio State-Penn State game. In the first quarter, officials ruled OSU intercepted a pass on what replay showed was an obvious drop.

Following the game, officials acknowledged that "technically the play was not thoroughly reviewed" due to "technical difficulties."

We should point out, however, that technically, the play was reviewed: the replay booth began the game with only one overhead shot making it all but impossible to overturn the blown call. You could read the jerseys though, so that's something.

Later in the game, the Nittany Lions learned that the play clock is not so much a rule as a guideline. Among all the other plays that can be reviewed, checking to see if time expired before the snap is not an option. A "breakdown in officiating mechanics" broke OSU's way during a 49-yard field goal in the second quarter. In the replay, the play clock hits zero and you can get to three-Mississippi before Ohio State snaps the ball.

Not only did the officials fail "to properly monitor the play clock" during the kick, so did everyone else: neither the announcers nor the players noticed in the moment. Officials admitted the "slight delay" between the play clock and the snap "far exceeded tolerance," begging the question: What's the tolerance? What does the rule book say, "close enough?" We demand details.

Related: Former NFL VP of Officiating Mike Pereira believes (as in, vehemently) SEC officials are listening to a "mystery man" who speaks to them via the officials' headset during the game.

100. Forthcoming reactions to the Playoff Selection Committee Rankings.

The committee will release the rankings for the first time on Tuesday, which will lead to all manner of tiresome commentary. Analysts can, and will, link every member of the committee to a school with playoff aspirations. The only surefire sign of conspiracy will be if Air Force makes the list. Air Force Lieutenant General Mike Gould of the Air Force sits on the committee and we're pretty sure whatever Gould says goes.


Mike Luce is our man on campus - every Friday and Monday. He welcomes your comments.

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Posted on Oct 22, 2021