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The Chinese Guide To The Fighting Illini

Because the University of Illinois has 4,500 undergrads and post-grads from China in its student body, the school will simulcast Illini football games this fall in Chinese. For our Anglo readers, we've thoughtfully translated several phrases that are likely to recur on the air from the student announcers so you can recognize the words when they are repeated.

Yesu! Nandao women meiyou RENHE REN shui keyl gan shang tuishai de jiaoluo? Jesus! Don't we have ANYONE who can catch a fade to the corner?"

Women tebie xiaozu xi. Our special teams suck.

Shi women yinggai zhe guoge changge ma? Which national anthem are we supposed to sing?

Ta de di san ge he. It's 3rd-and-3. (There is no known translation for "Now PASS the fucking ball!")

Ni dui zhe ci quan zhan de jieshu, xia? What's the over and under on this dog show?

Shi bushi laibuji zhuanyi dao xibei? Is it too late to transfer to Northwestern?

Women yinggai za xiangle qiu. We should pound the ball.

Zhishao beike man bei jiegu, dan tamen weisheme bu zhixing ta ma? At least Beckman was fired but why didn't they execute him?

Wo bu renwei wo jianguo zheme duo de lao bai de ren zai tong yige difang. I never seen so many old white people in one place.

Tixing wo, weisheme women xuyao yige wan sai. Remind me why we want a bowl game.

Shenme ta ma de shi Oskee? What the fuck is Oskee?

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Comments welcome. Huanying pinglun.

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