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Sigh. I suppose once the NFL decided it was safe to re-enter the 21st century, the scourge of Nipplegate having passed its radioactive half-life, the inevitable choice of first contemporary act would be the Black Eyed Peas. Lyrically inert, rhythmically dance-tastic, sizable back catalog, perfectly willing to compromise their artistic integrity for the sake of the all-mighty dollar . . . they're the ideal choice to make a viewing public still reeling from Prince's subliminal fretwork feel like they're down with what the kids are listening to these days. Besides, Beyoncé is opening a car dealership in Burbank that weekend.
So for those of you unfamiliar with this wager, once the halftime entertainment for the upcoming Super Bowl is announced, I start taking predictions of which songs will be performed. Choose three songs; the person who guesses the most correctly wins bragging rights for the year. Hopefully no one in the band will give away the set list prior to the show, ROGER DALTREY.
Please put your picks in the order you think they will be performed; I have a feeling we're going to have some similar lists this year. The tie breaker is going to be a long payoff: when the NFL retreats to their stock of dated white males next year, will it be Bon Jovi or Mellencamp?
1. Let's Not Get Retarded in Here as It's Offensive to Mainstream America so We'll Get It Started Instead
2. The Time (Dirty Bit) [hit the deck if you're watching with me; this song makes me want to v.om.it]
3. Meet Me Halfway
Next year: Mellencamp. Come on, the game's in Indy.
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