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Ricketty Rebuild

Um, what? After enduring yet another horrible week of Cubs baseball I am left with a question. What is this? Sure, the answer is "a rebuilding year." But there is so little to build with here. It's like trying to build a skyscraper with some pipe cleaners and Elmer's glue.

That's just not going to hold up. Yes my friends, this is rock bottom. Whodathunkit?

Well, everyone kinda thunk it this year I guess, but now that we are here, it's friggin tough to deal with. Which makes me think of the alternative.

You know, the way these guys have always done it. Like we could be watching guys like Aramis Ramirez dog it out there and still be three times better than anything we have going on at third base.

Or we could have found another veteran first baseman willing to take some big money just so the Cubs could hover around .500 for most of the season before calling it a year.

I mean, we could all see those types of moves weren't getting them too far, but would it be better than this?

The short answer is yes, the Cubs would have a few more Ws right now if they went that route. But what about the big picture, you say? Would this second scenario be better in the long run as well? The answer is probably yes as well. And I say this for a few reasons. First, this is horrible, and second, this is going to take forever, so in the meantime why not win at least a little.

I hope that four years from not we can say that this patheticness was worth it, but there is real chance it won't be. Maybe I'm just not cut out for rock bottom.

Week in Review: The Cubs went 2-5 for the week, losing the final game of four in San Fran and then losing two of three each to the Brewers and Twins. But, they did score eight or more runs in their two wins. I don't know why they don't listen to me and just score eight or more runs every game, because when they do they always win.

The Week in Preview: The Cubs come home to host a few interleague opponents as the Tigers and the Red Sox come to Wrigley. To say that interleague play has lost all of it's excitement is an understatement.

The Second Basemen Report: I wrote last week that Darwin Barney is apparently adequate at second base after all. And the Cubs started him there for every game last week. And Darwin responded by being Darwin Barney. Which means he barely did anything; six hits and one walk. But that's just how the ghost of Jim Hendry would have drawn it up.

In former second basemen news, Mark Grudzielanek retired in 2010 at the age of 40. He last played for the Cubs in 2004. What he is doing now I do not know. Grudzy! He is missed.

Crazy Corners: Ian Stewart continues to get most of the starts at third, yet the Cubs have been sitting Bryan LaHR against lefties. Apparently Jeff Baker is too good to sit against lefties - and so is Ian Stewart. The only problem with that statement is that it's not true. You can really sit Jeff Baker anytime you like because he's, um, he's Jeff Baker. I'm pretty sure he can play third as well, but he just doesn't for some reason.

Weekly Bunting Report: I may have missed a few bunts this week because there were so many blowouts and there is only so much my stomach can take. But I'm pretty sure at least Tony Campana tried a few times.

The Zam Bomb: Big Z gave up seven earned in a loss this week to the Rays and left the game with lower back stiffness. Finally the Big Z we know and love - the one who doesn't hydrate and gives up homers. This makes me happy but makes Big Z Angry.



Endorsement No-Brainer: Alfonso Soriano for rent-a-bat. For when you play in the American League and need a guy who can heat up for weeks at a time and can't play the field, it's rent-a-bat. Try rent-a-bat and you'll be sorry too.

Ameritrade Stock Pick of the Week: Shares of Cub tickets traded lower this week as no one wants to go, even to what they thought was going to be a marquee match-up this week with the Red Sox.

Sink or Sveum: 32% Analytical, 64% Emotional. Sveum drops another eight points on the Dale-O-Meter this week due to not being very bright and bringing in Manny Corpas for James Russell in the ninth for no good reason on Thursday night in the same game he didn't pinch-run for Alfonso Soriano in the eighth with Tony Campana on the bench and the Cubs down by one. On a scale of Bat Sh#t Crazy (Charles Manson), Not All There (random guy with a neck tattoo), Thinking Clearly (Jordi LaForge) and Non-Emotional robot (Data), Dale is really just crazy.

manson.jpgneck.jpg jordi.jpgdata.jpg

And just like your thought-to-be level-headed uncle, Dale has a perfectly good car, but sometimes likes to go to the junk yard, buy a lousy car no one wants and then drive that car on his way to job interviews yet can't understand that he didn't get the job after his car broke down and he was three hours late to the interview.

Over/Under: The number of walk-off homers Norichika Aoki will have the rest of his career: +/- .5.

Don't Hassle The Hoff: Micah Hoffpauir might be hurt as he only started one game this week - or he could just be hassled.

Beachwood Sabermetrics: A complex algorithm performed by The Cub Factor staff using all historical data made available by Major League Baseball has determined that four years may not be enough.

The Cub Factor: Unlike Alfonso Soriano, you can catch 'em all!

The White Sox Report: Know the enemy.

Fantasy Fix: Call-Ups Maybe.


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