Sports

Lovie vs. Lovie

By The Beachwood Island Affairs Desk

Lovie Smith vs. Lovie Howell.

Lovie Smith: Lost at sea on six-game schedule.

Lovie Howell: Lost at sea on seven-hour cruise.

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Lovie Smith: Gets off the bus running.

Lovie Howell: Gets out of her limo shopping.

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Lovie Smith: Every week is another horrible showing.

Lovie Howell: Every week is another horrible show.

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Lovie Smith: A millionaire who is bad at his job.

Lovie Howell: A millionaire who has no job.

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Lovie Smith: Fate depends on Virginia McCaskey.

Lovie Howell: Is same age as Virginia McCaskey.

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Lovie Smith: Is in the same boat as Ron Turner, Jerry Angelo and Ted Phillips.

Lovie Howell: Was in the same boat as the professor, Ginger and Mary Ann.

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Lovie Smith: Divorcing him would be costly.

Lovie Howell: Divorcing her would be costly.

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Lovie Howell: Her crew couldn't fix a hole in a boat.

Lovie Smith: His running back can't find a hole in the line.

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Lovie Smith: Clings stubbornly to outdated defensive scheme.

Lovie Howell: Clings stubbornly to outdated gowns.

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Lovie Smith: Laconic style is grating.

Lovie Howell: Voice is grating.

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Lovie Smith: Least liked cast member.

Lovie Howell: Least liked cast member.

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Contributions welcome.

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