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Rahm's Plan C

The Beachwood has learned, however, that Rahm is also working on Plans C through Z. To wit:

* Hold the school board hostage for $1 million $6 billion.

* Sell naming rights to all CPS kids.

* Welcome to the world's first all-online school district!

* CPS kids work off pension debt as Aramark janitors.

* Make Winnetka a Sister City and ask to borrow some money to go to the mall.

* Sell the whole city to George Lucas and let him worry about it.

* Introducing Schools in Space!

* Kickstarter.

* First National Bank of Chiraq.

* Let it all ride on Papa's Mustache in the fourth.

* CPS CEO for a Day Auction, starting with J.B. Pritzker and Ken Griffin.

* CPSAfterDark.com.

* Use the New Math!

* Tell Indiana to "Look over there!" and swipe the dough out of their till.

* Strip like the rest of us when we need cash.

* Introducing CPS CEO Kevin Trudeau!

* Chicago Pepsi Schools.

* Close down the Central Office 15 more times.

* School-based casinos.

* David Vitale/Billy Corgan dunk tank.

* Seize the Daley family's assets and call it civil forfeiture.

* Marry a rich city.

* Call in that Taylor Swift chit.

* Sell off that stupid Picasso.

-

Comments welcome.



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Posted on July 2, 2015


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