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Must Like Puppies

Today I became convinced that the best way to test the quality of a political candidate is to determine if he or she likes puppies. I do not know about you, but I never will vote for a candidate, Democrat or Republican, liberal or conservative, who is not a canine lover.

What convinced me that this is valid criteria to select a candidate is an article on the Huffington Post about Illinois State Rep. Mike Bost (R-Murphysboro). Bost is running for Congress this year. His slogan is "Passionate Leadership for Southern Illinois."

Apparently his passion was expressed back in 1986 when he shot and killed a neighbor's beagle. Now, the dog did bite his daughter in the face - after she provoked it. And I love dogs. But my two daughters come before any animal. I will do anything to protect my princesses. Bost's case is a slightly different. He took the law into his own hands. Impatient that the authorities were not responding to his complaint, he grabbed his gun then went to the dog's cage and killed it.

A jury did find Bost not guilty of any criminal charges. When reacting to attacks on children, it is very American for juries to be sympathetic for parents seeking personal justice.

Bost has had several contacts with the local police over the years, both as a subject and a victim. He has a reputation for being passionate on the floor of the General Assembly. Democrats describe him as unsound and having a volatile temper. There are several videos on YouTube where you can watch Bost and decide for yourself.

What I want to do is develop a puppy test for all candidates. Here's how it goes: Whenever office contenders are out making a political stump speeches, bring a cardboard box full of 8-week-old puppies to the event. After the candidate begins speaking, let the puppies go free as close as possible to his feet.

Think about it. If he kicks the cute cuddly critters, would you vote for him? What if he screams and swears and then calls out to his entourage to remove the animals? How about if he simply goes on with his speech, ignoring the whining, peeing and pooping?

Me, if he stops talking, bends down and starts talking baby talk all the while rubbing the pups' furry little ears, he's got my vote.


Ed Hammer is a retired police captain and author of the book One Hundred Percent Guilty. He can be reached through his website.


Previously by Ed Hammer:
* George Ryan's Park Bench
* George Ryan's Dogs and Ponies
* George Ryan's Other Jailhouse Interview
* Bugging The Chicago School Board
* Cop vs. Teacher
* Signs of Change
* Pols vs. Teachers
* The Terre Haute Redemption
* Rahm's War On Teachers
* About Those Indicted Nurses
* Body Language Bingo: A Guide To Watching The Presidential Debates
* George Ryan's Day Of Independence
* The Ironic George Ryan.
* George Ryan Is Unrepentant.


See also: Honoring A True Illinois Hero.


Comments welcome.


Posted on November 1, 2014

MUSIC - Chief Keef Changed The Industry.
TV - Vizio's Best Product Is You.
POLITICS - UIC: Soda Taxes Work.
SPORTS - More McCaskey Malpractice.

BOOKS - All About Poop.


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