|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
![]()
|
![]() |
If Joe Maddon Were Mayor . . .* The head of the CTA one day would be the head of CPS the next . . . * Zoo Day: Animals released into city streets to get residents to relax. * We'd not only have an elected school board, Chris Coghlan would be on it. * Aldermen required to wear onesies to city council meetings. * Cops wouldn't carry guns, man. * No more charter schools - or schools at all, man. Learn in the streets, it'll be cool! * 162 new city holidays. * Taxes become voluntary, but for some reason you'll want to pay. * The foie gras ban is back: It's not nice to force-feed geese to grotesquerie just to create delicacies. * Gathers gang leaders for summit; truce declared. * Respect 90 mph. * Rainbow light cameras - that don't issue tickets. * A fifth star for the city flag representing the pitcher batting eighth. * Marijuana legalized, obvi. * Everybody gets a pension. * City finally gets super awesome recycling program. * Garbage fee? City picks up for free. * No more rubber stamp city council. Do your job! * Ed Burke designated for assignment. * City hosts baseball draft instead of football draft. * Jay Cutler forced to vaccinate his kids. * Hawk Harrelson only allowed to broadcast road games. - Posted on October 6, 2015 |
![]() |
![]()
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
![]() © 2006 - 2021, The Beachwood Media Company |