Blago TV

Our former governor's future viewing schedule.

Midnight - 1 a.m.: Scrambled porn.

1 a.m. - 2 a.m.: More scrambled porn.

2 a.m. - 3 a.m.: Screw Talk with Lisa: No-mark billy club etiquette.

3 a.m. - 4 a.m.: Guard-TV: Advanced cavity and cell search techniques.

4 a.m. - 5 a.m.: Mass for shut-ins.

5 a.m. - 6 a.m.: Morning wake-up: Get Your Funk and Bunk Out with Rapmaster G

6 a.m. - 7 a.m.: Where's Lindsay?

7 a.m. - 8 a.m.: Where's Lindsay? Aftershow.

8 a.m. - 9 a.m.: Advanced Shankmaking with Norm Abrams.

9 a.m. - 10 a.m.: Oprah.

10 a.m. - 11 a.m: Chess and Checkers for Meals and Profit.

11 a.m. - Noon: Sketch Artists' Roundtable.

Noon - 1 p.m.: Lunch special: Jailhouse Hooch-Brewin' with Beth.

1 p.m. - 2 p.m.: How Many Packs of Camels Are You Worth?

2 p.m. - 3 p.m.: Hans and Franz Pump You Up.

3 p.m. - 5 p.m.: Trading Places.

5 p.m. - 6 p.m: Screw Talk: This Is Why We Don't Give You People Spoons and Razor Blades.

6 p.m. - 7 p.m.: Dinnertime Theatre: When "Noooooooo!" Really Means "No"

7 p.m. - 8 p.m.: Screw Talk with Lisa: Advanced Waterboarding.

8 p.m. - 10 p.m.: Midnight Express.

10 p.m. - 11 p.m.: Erase Your Legal Debts with Peter Francis Geraci.

11 p.m. - Midnight: More scrambled porn.

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