The O'Hare UFO: What It Really Was

What was that unidentified flying object spotted hovering above Gate C-17 at O'Hare airport recently? A Beachwood investigation has narrowed the list to these 20 possibilities.

- A giant rotating TIF district.

- Dennis FitzSimons' golden parachute.

- A Starbucks location-scouting drone.

- The Alpha Centauri Outfit collecting their cut.

- Oprah's ego.

- Barack Obama's secret campaign headquarters.

- Barack Obama's space minders checking in on the status of Project Earth.

- Soldier Field on its first mission.

- An alien troop surge.

- Kanye West's ride.

- The Cubs' payroll spinning out of control.

- Rod Blagojevich's space minders delivering further instructions and a bigger comb.

- The Department of Homeland Security picking up all those hair products confiscated by airport security.

- O'Hare's first blue-light surveillance camera.

- Pat Robertson's ride.

- A CIA rendition ship.

- The Silver Line.

- ComEd's new headquarters.

- Ditka.

- George Ryan's getaway ship.