Chicago - Mar. 22, 2018
Music TV Politics Sports Books People Places & Things
Beachwood PP&T
Our monthly PP&T archive.
Rhymes for the Times.
Beachwood Bookmarks
So You've Decided To Be Evil
Vintage Beer Signs
Easy Bar Tricks
Best of Craigslist
Wacky Packages
Taquitos Snack Food Reviews
How Products Are Made
Everyday Mysteries
Chicago Zombie
Texts From Last Night
Fuck My Life
Awkward Family Photos
Ultra Local Geography
Best Pinball Machine Ever
Land of Sky Beer Waters
Calumet 412
Chicago Patterns
Vince Michael's Time Tells
Renegades of Funk Chicago

What Are The Odds That Santa Claus Actually Comes To Town?

With just days until Christmas, children and adults across the globe are hoping to get all the presents on their wish lists. Once again, one man is deemed with delivering all these presents the world over. Will Santa Claus once again get the job done? Is this the year that Santa doesn't show up? Will Santa's sleigh break down during his journey? Will he deem you naughty and put coal in your stocking? Once again beating everyone down the chimney the most reliable and accurate odds/information source on the web posted odds on all things related to Santa Claus!

"Now that everyone has a camera on their phone the race is on to be the person to video Santa Claus joyfully yelling, 'Ho, Ho, Ho!,'" said spokesman Geoff Johnson.

Analysts at posted the following odds regarding Santa Claus and Christmas:

Santa gets snowed in: 1000/1

Santa oversleeps: 25/1

Santa puts coal in your stocking: 3/1

Santa is real: 1/100

Santa is seen eating cookies in your kitchen: 1000/1

Over/under on Santa's weight: 240

Santa gets stuck in your chimney: 2/1

Santa's Christmas delivery list gets hacked: 5/1

Which city will Santa need to stop in to service his sleigh?

Mogadishu: 3/1
Caracas: 3/1
Alderaan: 3/1
Pittsburgh: 3/1

Santa shaved off his beard: 25/2

Santa upgraded to a more modern uniform: 25/2

Where Santa will vacation on December 26:

Scottsdale: 3/1
South Pole: 8/1
Silicon Valley: 20/1
Pittsburgh: 1000/1


For full analysis and further explanation, go here.


Comments welcome.


Posted on December 23, 2014

MUSIC - The Weekend In Chicago Rock.
TV - Flint Town.
POLITICS - OIG Getting All Up CPD's Butt.
SPORTS - Take Loyola.

BOOKS - The Soul Of America's Media.

PEOPLE PLACES & THINGS - My Twitter Advertisers.

Search The Beachwood Reporter

Subscribe To Our Newsletter

Follow BeachwoodReport on Twitter

Beachwood Radio!

Ask Me Anything!

Wool and Hoop