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The Five Dumbest Ideas of the Week

1. RIP, Bratz. I, for one, am going to miss all four of these anime-eyed Pussycat Dolls that inspired their very own American Psychological Association Task Force to investigate their effects on young girls.

And who can forget Bratz: The Movie, with Jon Voight's Oscar-worthy performance as Principal Dimly? Or those killjoys,
the National Child's Labor Committee, who claim that Bratz are manufactured in a Chinese sweatshop where women work a 94.5 hour work for $.52 an hour. And perky little Karaoke Jade Bratz, who dropped something that sounded a lot like the F-bomb*, to the consternation of parents everywhere. Next: Little Miss Trailer Trash.

*

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2. Speaking of dolls, the fashion world is eager to play Barbie with Michelle Obama, second-guessing her duds for the January inaugural. This is soooooo sexist - I mean, doesn't anybody care what Barack will wear? I have a suggestion if he decides not to go black tie.

3. Wondering what to bring to your office potluck? It takes balls to serve something like this.

And how about a side of Dancer, Prancer and Blitzen?

4. Bail out the Big 3? Oh, why not. And, to quote John McCain, I know just how to do it: Buy them a year's supply of lottery tickets.

5. It's official: Spencer Pratt says he did not drug Heidi Montag into marrying him. And why the hell do I know who Heidi and Spencer are when I've never watched their lamebrained show? I accidentally learned about them while reading loftier subject matter, like Gordon Ramsay's extramarital affairs.





Permalink

Posted on December 5, 2008


MUSIC - Muddy Waters Museum Has Mojo.
TV - WGN Now Trump TV.
POLITICS - President Trump Has 3,400 Conflicts Of Interest.
SPORTS - The Big Ten's Blood Money.

BOOKS - Searching For The World's Largest Owl.

PEOPLE PLACES & THINGS - New Mop Shaped Like Taco.


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