The Five Dumbest Ideas Of The Week

1. Reconciling with the ex-husband who beat you and exposed you to Hepatitis C: Pamela Anderson, noted Sunday School teacher and poker hustler.

2. Writing a memo urging impeachment proceedings against Gov. Rod Blagojevich while instructing recipients to lie about receiving the memo: Speaker of the House Michael Madigan.

3. Posting really creepy porn on a not-so-secret website while presiding over a pornography trial: Federal Appeals Court Chief Judge Alex Kozinski.

4. Urging Barack Obama to give a speech "admitting using race for political expediency": Fox TV panelist and putative liberal Juan Williams.

5. Under-seasoning the pork belly entree and admitting to choking under pressure : Top Chef finalist, molecular gastronomist and faux-hawk wearer Richard Blais.