Replacing The Olympic Village

By The Beachwood Village People Affairs Desk

Some ideas for what do to with the plot of land where the Olympic Village would have been built.

* A new federal prison for pols to save on driving so many of them back and forth to Oxford, Yankton and Terre Haute.

* A development owned in part by Michael Scott, Richard Stein, Tim Degnan, Jeremiah Joyce, Robert Vanecko and three mobsters to be named later.

* The Museum of Unbuilt Olympic Villages.

* Santa's Village. We're sure he could be lured here with an attractive package of tax subsidies.

* The Boulevard of Richard M. Daley's Broken Dreams. Featuring exhibits of the Lake Calumet Airport, the downtown Circulator, the downtown international casino complex, and the CTA Superstation, as well as a model of an undiscovered Hired Truck program in action and a city not under federal court monitor.

* The CTA Superstation.

* Blagoville. No need for animatronics here. Three shows daily - at least.

* Oprahville. Visitors would pay tiered fees according to how close they are allowed to stand to a stage where Oprah might actually appear one day. In the meantime, visit the gift stores.

* The Even Larger Hadron Supercollider. Finally see for the first time the amazing device the mayor uses to go back in time to change history when his office is buffeted by scandal.

* Block 37. Let's try its luck somewhere else.

* A hospital comprised of architecturally significant structures.

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Your suggestions welcome.

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From Beachwood reader Mark:

* Strogerville. A gathering place for all of his supporters (capacity: 500).

* Official US District Attorney substation. Get them special trucks and a pole to slide down and everything.

* The Spire II. When completed, will be the second-deepest empty hole in the city.

* Maybe a nice little lakefront commuter airstrip.

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