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QT: Notes From Backward Cultures


News Headline: "Saudi Arabia lashes abused woman for remarrying without consent."
News Headline: "House GOP blocks Violence Against Women Act."
It's a small world, after all.

···

News Headline: "Climate change warning ignored."
Or maybe if we started calling it the Climate Cliff. . . .

···

News Headline: "Libraries remake themselves in digital era."
News Headline: "1.1 million books to be removed from University of Saskatchewan libraries."
News Headline: "Library of Congress has amassed 170 billion tweets."
tim 2 + libryS 2 d list of tngs dat Rnt w@ dey uzd 2 B.

···

News Headline: "NASA considers capturing an asteroid, setting it to orbit moon."
What could possibly go wrong?

···

News Headline: "Obama sends up trial balloon on Social Security cuts."
News Headline: "Obama trial balloon on Gitmo."
News Headline: "Obama floats trial balloon on stricter gun control."
News Headline: "Obama trial balloon on Hagel?"
News Headline: "Nationwide helium shortage continues."
And whom might we blame for that?

···

QT Rules of Etiquette for Guys and Dolls:
+ All Christmas decorations should be taken down after the Twelve Days of Christmas.
+ Which ended the day before yesterday.
+ And the decorations should not go up again until the day after Thanksgiving.
+ Which is 325 days from now.
+ Ho, Ho, Ho!

···

The Case for Zero Tolerance of Modern School Administrators:
A six-year-old boy who pointed his finger and said "Pow!" was suspended by his school in Silver Spring, Md., while an entry was made in his record that he had "threatened to shoot another student."

···

News Headline: "Paul Ryan votes against aid for Hurricane Sandy victims."
Ryan's The Path to Prosperity: A Blueprint for American Renewal is now 1,559,895th on the Amazon best-seller list, for those keeping track.

···

Perihelion Day was five days ago.
Sorry. Forgot to mention it.
Again.
Boy, if QT had a nickel for every time it mixed up its periapsides. . . .

···

News Headline: "Concussion talk muted, dangers remain."
QT NFL Concussion Count with XXVIII Days to Go Until Super Bowl XLVI:
As of the season's end, NFL players had suffered CLXXV concussions.
Expect a baker's XII or so during the playoffs.

···
News Item: ". . . While cutting the number of smokers trims government outlays over the short run, the increased longevity of non-smokers eventually would cost taxpayers tens of billions of dollars. . . ."
So light up.
What kind of patriot are you?

···

QT Yellowstone Caldera (the eruptions of which can be violent enough to send a layer of ash six feet deep as far away as Chicago and which erupts every 600,000 or so years and last erupted 640,000 years ago) Update:
The U.S. Geological Survey reported "a notable increase in earthquake swarms" during December.
QT misplaced its dictionary.
Isn't "notable" a good thing?

···
News Headline: "Urinating man made noise like elephant."
There is probably an interesting story behind that.

···

QT Early Warning System:
Fourteen days remain until National Hugging Day.

···

QT Grammar R Us Seminar on the English Language:
News Item: ". . . She looks at Robert Frost's poem 'Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening' and observes that when it was written. . . ."
. . . no one gave much thought to the fact that it could be sung to the tune of "Hernando's Hideaway."
And some have yet to discover that much of Emily Dickinson's poetry can be sung to the Gilligan's Island theme.
Which isn't to mention what can be accomplished with "Yankee Doodle" and William Wordsworth. . . .


Write to QT at qt@beachwoodreporter.com
Visit QT at facebook.com/zaynsmithqt
QT appears Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays.



Permalink

Posted on January 7, 2013


MUSIC - College Radio, Eh?
TV - The Sublime Hong Kong Phooey.
POLITICS - CTU Strike Notebook.
SPORTS - Official Power Tools Of MiLB.

BOOKS - Trump Trade Guy's Fake Expert.

PEOPLE PLACES & THINGS - Renaming Lake Shore Drive.


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