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On the Juice: Day 7

Some people start the New Year off with a few poxy resolutions scribbled down somewhere only to be forgotten by February. Me? I'm going on a two-week juice fast.

Day 7: The longest chard
It's the halfway point of my fast and I think I can safely say that most of the serious detoxification is behind me. No more headaches, no more nose dripping like a tapped maple, no more confusing waves of digestive discomfort. I actually feel pretty damn good. So naturally, my thoughts are turning to the next week and what the biggest challenges will be for the remainder of the fast. I have a very busy schedule through Saturday, teaching yoga every day. Obviously, maintaining my energy level and packing enough juice will be two major issues from here on out. But these pale in comparison to the single greatest threat to my resolve: boredom.

Here's the thing about freshly-extracted fruit and vegetable juices. After a while, they all taste pretty much the same. I mean, there are obviously some minor variations on the basic theme, but more or less they're either kind of bitter or kind of sweet. However many combinations you come up with, they'll generally cancel each other out and become a smooth, thickish, vaguely-earthy liquid. The one notable exception is chard, which has a very distinct note of seaweed to it, similar to when you're wading in the ocean and you get hit in the face with a wave and accidentally swallow a little of it. Just me?

Another interesting thing to note about freshly extracted fruit and vegetable juices is their tendency to coat the tongue and the top of the mouth so that, over time, even if you did want to tease out the subtle differences between, say, kale/apple/cucumber and broccoli/pear/carrot, you'd be physically incapable of doing so. What I'm getting at here is that the act of consuming nutrition has become necessarily rote. There's no particular joy in it. It's all about scheduling, both the time to drink my meals and the time to prepare them. I've been watching my husband this past week lustily prepare and consume his meals and frankly, I'm getting a bit jealous. I miss being really excited about something I've cooked.

Don't get me wrong. I am enjoying the fast and someday, after my taste buds have sloughed off their protective shield, I intend to keep juicing. (Note to Dave: don't worry, I'll get my own juicer!) But waking up every day faced with the prospect of swallowing another half-gallon or so of primordial ooze is taking its toll on my psyche. Can I really go another week without any seasonings? Can I stand another seven days without any texture? And more importantly, can I make to next Sunday with a bright-green tongue?

Day 7 Hunger Level: I've accepted that my stomach is going to growl. That seems to be a fact of life. What's interesting is that the association with hunger is entirely mental. I hear my stomach growl. I think, "I must be hungry." Am I actually hungry? Most of the time, no. And if I am, a few ounces of juice will fix me right up.

Day 7 Energy Level: Uniformly high. I'm still having trouble figuring out when and how long to sleep. Once my eyes are open, they tend to stay that way.

Day 7 Physical Condition: Pretty damn good.

Day 7 Mental State: This new state of caloric boredom has provided a fresh challenge for me. I'm trying to keep myself busy so I don't have time to think about all the wonderful flavors I'm currently missing out on. Again, I should stress, this has nothing to do with being hungry or wanting to eat. I'm just, you know, bored off my ass.

Day 7 Juices:
#1: Pineapple, Blueberry, Apple, Chard, Seltzer Water
#2: Broccoli, Spinach, Kale, Celery, Carrot, Ginger, Apple
#3: Purchased Kagome Golden Peach drink (half bottle)
#4: Banana, Mango, Chard

Total amount: approx. 50 oz.

* On The Juice: Day 1. If you can't beet it, juice it.
* On The Juice: Day 2. Fire in the glory hole!
* On The Juice: Day 3. Sipping point.
* On The Juice: Day 4. Brush with destiny.
* On The Juice: Day 5. Food for thought.
* On The Juice: Day 6. Dinner-free dinner party.


Posted on January 7, 2007

MUSIC - Chief Keef Changed The Industry.
TV - Vizio's Best Product Is You.
POLITICS - UIC: Soda Taxes Work.
SPORTS - More McCaskey Malpractice.

BOOKS - All About Poop.


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