Chicago - Nov. 20, 2021
Music TV Politics Sports Books People Places & Things
 
Beachwood PP&T
Our monthly PP&T archive.
Chicagoetry
Rhymes for the Times.
Beachwood Bookmarks
So You've Decided To Be Evil
Vintage Beer Signs
Easy Bar Tricks
Best of Craigslist
Wacky Packages
Chicagology
Taquitos Snack Food Reviews
How Products Are Made
Everyday Mysteries
Chicago Zombie
FAIL
Texts From Last Night
Fuck My Life
Awkward Family Photos
QuackWatch
Alcademics
Lamebook
Ultra Local Geography
Uncyclopedia
Best Pinball Machine Ever
Land of Sky Beer Waters
Calumet 412
Chicago Patterns
Vince Michael's Time Tells
Renegades of Funk Chicago
History vs. Hollywood

The Streets Under The Streets Are Back

When I was a kid growing up in suburban Minneapolis, my parents would sometimes take me and my brother to Chicago for a weekend in the summer. My father had an uncle who lived here and used to work in the cab business; he knew how Chicago worked. Later he married well and moved to a pricey condo in Water Tower Place. We would do the museums and restaurants and so on, blah blah blah. But my favorite thing about Chicago was what I called "the streets under the streets." I always asked for one more drive on these subterranean marvels. It was just the coolest thing ever. (Memo to David Daskal: You don't have to live here to get it; quite the opposite. Native Chicagoans are much more nonchalant about the lower drives.)

Well, the city announced last Friday that the streets under the streets were back - open for driving after a lengthy reconstruction project. Let's take a look.

1. The New Lower Wacker Drive.

-

2. "This reconnects the fiber of the city."

3. Brighter, Cleaner, But Less Cinematic?

4. Did They Ruin It?

"Many drivers familiar who remember the dark, dank and dirty, Lower Wacker, may not recognize it any longer," the Expired Meter reports.

"It was tough to navigate," said [city transportation commissioner Gabe] Klein about the Lower Wacker of the past. "Someone told me once when they drove down a ramp onto Lower Wacker they said they would 'close your eyes, hit the gas and hope for the best'."

"I'm a believer especially in Lower Wacker Drive," said [Gov. Pat] Quinn. "It helps decrease pollution, decreases congestion - it's the 8th Wonder of the World - Lower Wacker Drive."

Well, Klein would probably prefer to turn it into a bike lane. And Quinn, well, has the Land of Lincoln ever had a more hyperbolic governor?

5. From Another 5-Star Yelp Review.

I love love love you lower wacker. Your fun to just crank the tunes up and start jamming as you make loops and turns.

Via Barbara Brotman's Lower Wacker, A Rite Of Initiation For The Brave.

6. The Old Lower Wacker Drive.

-

7. The Blues Brothers: This Must Be Lower Wacker Drive.

-

Comments welcome.



Permalink

Posted on December 3, 2012


MUSIC - Britney's IUD.
TV - Vizio's Best Product Is You.
POLITICS - Climate Deniers' 4 Top Scare Tactics.
SPORTS - The McEnroes In Antarctica.

BOOKS - Foxconned.

PEOPLE PLACES & THINGS - Don't Let Your Pet OD.


Search The Beachwood Reporter

Subscribe To Our Newsletter
Email:

Follow BeachwoodReport on Twitter



Beachwood Radio!