The Beer Goggle Recordings

I was in a death-metal/thrash/hardcore/Metallica cover/punk/funk band called Addiction!! for 38 seconds back in 1986. The band formed in my buddy's basement, when we were 13.

Chris could play "Paranoid" all the way through on the drums; Reggie and Paul knew the chords to "Smoke on the Water." I screamed with rage.

We did one take of "Iron Man," a couple of shots of stolen Everclear, and I was fired as lead singer. Apparently, I wasn't "jelling" with the band.

I've never gotten over that rejection. The entire rock star career I had planned - first superstardom, then megastardom and finally a living legend - collapsed in front of my eyes. I had already written out my discography, set lists and Grammy awards.

Digging through some old notebooks the other day, I discovered the liner notes that I wrote for my mid-career, drug-addled, alcoholic vanity country rock album.

I had planned for this to be my "hit bottom" album before I came roaring back with the greatest comeback album of all time: think Black and Blue before Some Girls.

Here, then, is the tracklist for my album Beer Goggle Self Esteem: Ode to Alcoholism.

1. I Only Like Myself Drunk

2. Momma Loves Me But Can't Stand Me

3. I Love This Fucking Spaghetti

4. King of the World (Oh God, What Have I Done)

5. Vagina Pyjamas

6. I'm Douchebag Sober

7. Bitter Masturbation

8. Man In The Mirror (Piss Off)

9. I Promise Baby, Tomorrow

10. That's All Very Interesting

11. What's the Point? (Live)

With Meghan Galbraith.

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Comments welcome.

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Other Lists By Drew Adamek:
* Today's Syllabus
* Shit My Dad Says
* Work Weirdos
* Things I Miss About Chicago
* 20 Albums I Wish I Had Never Bought
* Their Chicago
* Cities I've Slept In
* My Favorite 1980s Chicago Radio Memories
* Why Milwaukee Rules
* Why I'm Glad I Don't Live In D.C. Anymore

Plus:
* Fan Note: Me & Metallica

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