The Weekend Desk Report

"The University of Illinois is spending $900,000 on four buses to shuttle employees and others between its Urbana/Champaign and Chicago campuses," AP reports.

Wait, what?

"The service is for faculty members, students and staff members traveling on university business."

Okay, but is there really a lot of university business that requires such a commute? UIC students who have a Thursday class in Champaign?

"The service is scheduled for launching on Oct. 31, and will offer three round trips daily between the two campuses. They will depart in the early morning, at midday and late afternoon."

Three trips daily? What am I missing here? Or are these party buses? Then, maybe.

"University President Tim Killeen says the idea has been under consideration for almost two years."

He would have decided sooner if the commute by car hadn't been so distracting.

"Killeen says the 18-seat buses will be 'well-appointed' with onboard Wi-Fi, tables and a restroom so people can work in comfort."

Also, with bumper stickers: My other bus is a classroom.

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How is the distance here calculated at just 2 hours, 21 minutes?

Driving to Orland Park when I worked in the Tribune's bureau there used to take 45 minutes to an hour. Is Champaign a lot closer than I think?

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Water Polo
"Dozens of people jumped into the Chicago River Saturday morning, to show just how clean it is," CBS2 Chicago reports.

Write your own punchline.

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New on the Beachwood . . .

Beachwood Sports Radio: Double Zoinks
Bears not who we thought they were. But who are they? Plus: Chicago Predicts Bears Season, Audio Version; Cubs Suddenly Better Than Bears; Like Theo Before Him, Rick Hahn Is A Stone-Cold Liar, and more!

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America Still Hungry
37.2 million Americans face hunger, including 11.2 million children.

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Weekend ChicagoReddit

According to Spotify, Chicago is the only city that cares about my music. Here is my new single. from r/chicago

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Weekend ChicagoGram

View this post on Instagram

#Hairatage Series featuring new work from the collection for an installation at the #haitianmuseumofchicago opening Friday, January 3rd 2020- closing Monday April 20th.

A post shared by Joël Maximé, Jr. (@cravechicago) on Sep 5, 2019 at 6:34pm PDT

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Weekend ChicagoTube

Chicago: A Third World City / Philmore Green, Full Album Stream

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Weekend BeachBook

Meet The Entitled Kara Swisher.

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Bold Thief Steals Every Guitar From Pilsen Music Store: 'This Might Be The End Here,' Shocked Owner Says.

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'Behind Closed Doors': The Friction Between The Nike Brand And Its Corporate Culture.

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100-Drone Aerial Light Show Viewable From The Parking Lots South Of The iHotel Off South First Street, Champaign, Hosted By Aerospace Engineering At The University Of Illinois.

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Weekend TweetWood

After blocking investigations into dark money groups while on the FEC, Matt Petersen is taking a job at a law firm that specializes in dark money groups https://t.co/ZgMGyN9WoN

— Karl Evers-Hillstrom (@KarlMEvers) September 5, 2019

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If a six year old child were a hurricane expert, he would sound like this.

pic.twitter.com/BVBGljja8A

— Beki Knott (@lotsofuss) September 1, 2019

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Elizabeth Warren Blows Ridiculous CNN Climate Change Question Out of the Water https://t.co/DB4KxKfX8M via @Splinter_news

— Beachwood Reporter (@BeachwoodReport) September 6, 2019

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Person Caught Saying "I Never Had My Butt Fingered" On #Bears Broadcast https://t.co/fUKgMLyjiy via @deadspin

— Beachwood Reporter (@BeachwoodReport) September 6, 2019

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The Beachwood and Butt-Head Tip Line: Spank the funky.

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