Chicago - Dec. 15, 2017
Music TV Politics Sports Books People Places & Things
 
Must-See TV
Army Of Darkness
ElRey
5 p.m.
A discount-store employee is time-warped to a medieval castle, where he is the foretold savior who can dispel the evil there. Unfortunately, he screws up and releases an army of skeletons. (tvguide.com)
Weather Derby
Tribune: 51/37
Sun-Times: Ferro/McKinney
Weather Channel: 44/41
Ntl Weather Service: 54/43
BWM*: 82/12
Beachwood Bookmarks
K-Tel Classics
WKRP in Cincinnati
So You've Decided To Be Evil
St. Paul Saints
Nye's Polonaise Room
The Arcata Eye
Roadside USA
This Day In . . .
Onion History
Weird Al History
Baseball History
Beachwood History
History History
Spy Magazine History
#OnThisDate History
Chicago
Indicted!
Under Suspicion
Find Your Towed Car
Cable TV Complaints
Freedom of Information
The Expired Meter
The Mob & Friends
Stolen Bike Registry
O'Hare Music Tracker
Rats
Report Corruption (city)
Report Corruption (state)
Beyond
Scoundrels, State
Scoundrels, Federal
The Odds
Random Flight Tracker
Casting Calls
Cosmic Log
Buy Stamps
Beachwood Blogroll
A Handy List
Beachwood Ethics Statement
How We Roll
Today's Horoscope
Liberties will be taken.
Do We Sudoku?
No, but we do do moose stuff, and that can be anything you want it to be. Except Sudoku.
Losing Lottery Numbers
8, 25, 39
Daily Affirmation
I am open and receptive to new avenues of income. (louisehay.com)
Ellie
Knowing that a person may be unwittingly in danger of an assault imposes a moral duty to warn them.
Now Playing
Psychodrama/Marshall Law
Letters to the Editors
FAQ
About
Tip Line
"The Papers" archive
RSS
Beachwood Link Buttons
Media Kit/Advertising
 

The Weekend Desk Report

Market Update
It's been a while since we've checked in on the Civilization Exchange, and the news is not good. Despite a coordinated effort to defraud potential shareholders, Human futures plunged this week after strong data indicated the company might never cap its out-of-control expenses.

Civil Warming
So just to review, the Bush administration has spent years concealing damaging information and distorting a major threat to national security. Now that the situation has turned toxic, Bush has acknowledged the issue in a high-profile stump speech, rejected any counter proposals and declared that the best solution is just to keep on keepin' on. Gee, didn't see that one coming.

One Forward, Two Back
Well, at least President Bush's ingenious strategy to boost research into AIDS treatment and prevention by gutting funding for overseas family planning centers he finds morally insupportable is finally paying dividends. Perhaps he should use this logic to tackle similar problems here at home.

Careful What You Wish For
Because seriously, George, it could cost you.

No Canada
Our Northern neighbor this week continued a relentless legislative push to ban all fun, declaring it is now illegal to be stoned in Canada. However, officials hinted they may look the other way should you wish to get stoned in Canada.

Clean Ass A Whistle
In local news, Ald. Arenda Troutman this week confidently declared that a substance found in her home was a fiber supplement used to cleanse her colon rather than cocaine, as suggested by the FBI. Which should make it easier for her to comply when prosecutors tell her to blow it out her ass.

Bitter Ends
Finally, we're going to refrain from making any formal recommendations with regard to Super Bowl wagering. It's up to you, really. So ask yourself, would you rather be knackered or drowned? Then bet accordingly.

*

The Weekend Desk also recommends the city's best Super Bowl links.



Permalink

Posted on February 3, 2007


MUSIC - The Week In Chicago Rock.
TV - Cricket vs. Brexit.
POLITICS - Trailer: Swing District.
SPORTS - Ryan Pace's Narratives Are Killing Us.

BOOKS - Chicago For Dummies.

PEOPLE PLACES & THINGS - The Sears Motor Buggy.


Search The Beachwood Reporter

Subscribe To Our Newsletter
Email:

Follow BeachwoodReport on Twitter



Beachwood Radio!


Ask Me Anything!