Army Of Darkness
A discount-store employee is time-warped to a medieval castle, where he is the foretold savior who can dispel the evil there. Unfortunately, he screws up and releases an army of skeletons. (tvguide.com)
Note: Weekend Desk Editor Natasha Julius is advising the NCAA Basketball Tournament Selection Committee on her unique bracket algorithms in order to ensure maximum enjoyment for all of America this year. The Weekend B Team is filling in on the desk to make sure no news goes unnoticed in her absence.
Bank of Beijing
We here at the Weekend Desk, for one, would like to welcome our new Chinese overlords. We'd like to remind them that, as a trusted news source, we could be helpful in rounding up others to work in your leaden toy factories and prison sweatshops.
President Obama announced on Friday that his economic team was working on the creation of a "post-bubble" economic model. Separately, the president's Council of Science Advisers said they were working on a post-gravity model, while the Justice Department announced it was working on a post-crime model. Each should be ready for publication in peer-reviewed academic journals by the time America is post-Obama.
First Lady Alert
Michelle Obama says she watches "non-important TV" when she wants to relax before bed. Ha! "Non-important TV!" Talk about an oxymoron.
The city's Olympic committee has ditched its slogan "Stir the Soul" for the new "Let Friendship Shine." Apparently "Stir the Soul" translated to "Stir Your Insides" in some languages. And in some precincts of Chicago, it translated to "Hold On To Your Wallet." In some languages, "Let Friendship Shine" translates to "Let Friendship Pay" and is designed to assure both pals of the mayor and members of the IOC that the Chicago Way is alive and kicking butt.