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The Weekend Desk Report

Sadly, the Weekend Desk is going to melt away on Saturday. But that won't stop us from covering the stories that matter.

Market Update
Although the week saw a sizable rally on Wall Street, You didn't fare too well. Your first period earnings were way off and Your asset valuation has been slashed by a couple hundred billion. And let's not even discuss Your overseas holdings, which have taken a pounding recently.

Caveat Emptor
In other news, duh.

Man for All Seasons
Newly appointed Chicago schools CEO Ron Huberman has reacted swiftly to a reduction of education funds included in President Obama's economic stimulus plan. Huberman says if new funding is not secured by a certain nebulous date, he will be forced to slash services and hike fees. Sadly, we're not kidding.

Strongman for All Seasons
Meanwhile, Police Superintendent Jody Weis was hammered at a recent city council meeting due to several high-profile gaffes. Not wishing to see another of his favorites pilloried further, Mayor Daley has announced Weis will now run the CTA.

He's Just Not That Into You
Despite repeated infidelities, U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton says she remains committed to her toxic relationship with Vladimir Putin. Sources say Clinton's close friends are willing to look the other way, despite the fact Putin is "clearly not the man she fell in love with anymore."

Batman for All Seasons
Finally this week, actor Christian Bale has apologized for an explosive rant during a recent film shoot. Not wanting to see another of his favorites pilloried further, Mayor Daley has announced Bale will be Chicago's new top cop.


Sunday Note From the Lake County Desk
Looks like former Lake County GOP chairman, Green Oaks mayor, and onetime bigwig business dude Tom Adams finally is going to face judgment for his hobby: child porn. He was busted in 2006 (so long ago we didn't even know who Barack Obama was) for shipping some dicey materials to a friend he made in Florida who turned out to be an undercover cop decoy (don't they always?). The court system in Lake County - composed primarily of almost all GOP office-holding prosecutors, sheriffs and judges - managed to play Where's Waldo for years before shipping Adams' case to Kane County. He's dodged and pirouetted long enough to avoid mandatory sentences for distribution and now will face only the possession rap. In the meantime, he's been evaluated for the last four months at the Community Youth Network in Grayslake. Sentencing is set for June.

- David Rutter


Posted on February 7, 2009

MUSIC - Who's Next In Chicago Rap.
TV - Tribune-Nexstar Deal Is Bad News.
POLITICS - Big Soda Hates You.
SPORTS - The Ex-Cub Factor.

BOOKS - Wright Brothers, Wrong Story!

PEOPLE PLACES & THINGS - The Bad News About Human Nature.

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