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A discount-store employee is time-warped to a medieval castle, where he is the foretold savior who can dispel the evil there. Unfortunately, he screws up and releases an army of skeletons. (tvguide.com)
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The [Wednesday] Papers

"Nanci Koschman waited too long to sue Chicago Police officers and Cook County prosecutors for failing to charge a nephew of former Mayor Richard M. Daley with killing her son, David Koschman, according to lawyers trying to get her civil-rights lawsuit thrown out," the Sun-Times reports.

Right. She should have sued before that file was found.

*

"The mother could have sued when news reports revealed that Vanecko was involved, according to Vincent J. Connelly, a private attorney hired by City Hall who argues in a court filing Tuesday that the city and 21 police officers should be dropped from the case."

Or, and just hear me out here, the city could have come clean when news reports revealed that Vanecko was involved. Just sayin'.

*

Do us all a favor, Rahm: Don't harass Nanci Koschman on our account. We'll pay the settlement. Or better yet: Go collect the money from your pals and the pals of the Daley family. They owe us all that - and they owe Nanci Koschman that in spades.

*

"Nanci Koschman's 'failure to [sue sooner] is the cause of her injuries, not the purported cover-up,' Connelly wrote."

Tax dollars funded that argument. Vincent J. Connelly, you are Today's Worst Person In Chicago.

*

"He has the full package: he's a lawyer of enormous talents and a tremendous human being."

*

Jimmy Fallon was just about to ask about Koschman when he ran out of time and had to get to Jonah Hill.

*

"And then I thought, fuck Nanci Koschman! You should've sued when you had your chance!"

*

"Cook County State's Attorney Anita Alvarez also argues Koschman waited too long to sue her, her chief of staff Dan Kirk and her predecessor Richard Devine," the Sun-Times also reports.

Of course she does.

In other news, Darren O'Brien waited too long to resign.

*

"Jonah Hill apologizes on the Tonight Show after learning the hard way that gay slurs are never cool to invoke."

Then Rahm told Hill to take out his fucking tampon.

-

("Jonah Hill apologizes" description is from NPR's Eric Deggans' LinkedIn page; had a linking issue.)

Game Of Little Chance
So, basically, the problem is that not enough Illinoisans are throwing their money away on the virtual impossibility of winning the lottery.

*

In an alternate universe, the headline is: Officials Laud Increase In Cognitive Skills.

*

Maybe Illinois oughta move to Manila.

City Of Night
Chicago is in many ways the most ironic of cities, and becoming a City of Lights would make it even more so for a town that likes to keep so much of its business in the dark.

*

Alternate: I wonder how much of the bidding and building process will be done in the dark.

Ricketts Racket
Even Cubs radio goes minor league.

*

Theo Epstein promises a better broadcast in five years.

Fantasy Fix
Is The Captain Still Clutch?

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BeachBook
* Bank Of America Says Picketty Is Right.

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TweetWood

*

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The Beachwood Tip Line: Clutch.



Permalink

Posted on June 4, 2014


MUSIC - The Week In Chicago Rock.
TV - Trump FCC Opens Corporate Media Merger Floodgates.
POLITICS - Offshore Leaks Database.
SPORTS - Beachwood Radio: Broken Bears; Cubs' 7-Year Itch.

BOOKS - Inside The Book Of The Dead.

PEOPLE PLACES & THINGS - Lakes, Cheese & You.


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