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The [Wednesday] Papers

"Pakistani authorities said Wednesday they have jailed and intend to charge Mayor Rahm Emanuel's former city comptroller Amer Ahmad after taking him into custody Monday with a fake Mexican passport, a forged visa to enter their country and a large amount of cash," the Sun-Times reports.

Ahmad was carrying about $146,000 and 126,000 euros in cash when he was stopped by authorities Monday morning at the international airport in Lahore, said Usman Anwar, the Punjab region director for the Federal Investigation Agency, the Pakistani equivalent of the FBI.

"He said he that he lived in America and lied that he never had American nationality," Anwar told the Chicago Sun-Times from the FIA's offices in Lahore.

"He said he came home to Pakistan and didn't say he was involved in fraud or anything," Anwar said. "We Googled him."

Which is more than Rahm's vetting squad did.

Comparative Literature
"Activist, Author Of Vicious Letter To Daley, Gets 27 Months."

What was he mad about, R.J. Vanecko's 60-day sentence?

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No, but really, the "activist" wrote some pretty fucked-up shit.

Chicago Math
"More Cops Will Patrol Parks, Transit System To Curb Summer Violence."

Where are they coming from, the Central Office?

Utility Belt
"Exelon Shelling Out $6.83 Billion For Pepco."

Somehow I think Exelon's customers will be shelling out $6.83 billion for Pepco.

Phone Sex
"AT&T Getting Into Inflight Wi-Fi Business."

Even more people getting into the Mile High Club, 'cause you're gonna get screwed.

Rest In Peace
"1 Million Thermometers Recalled For Fire Risk."

They were remembered fondly.

Table Service
"Bourbon-Glazed Salmon Feeds A Crowd."

The whiskey-glazed perch had the night off.

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The Mouse That Roared
Chicago's most talented - and controversial - rapper may be this 14-year-old.

Chuck Roast
Goudie Continues To Insist He Didn't Report What He Clearly Reported.

Parochial Potholes
Hardly a problem particular to Chicago.

April Baseball
The month's best and worst includes Jose and Hammel.

From The Pogues To Phiraq
Plus: Kathy Kelly vs. Jenny McCarthy. In Local Book Notes.

Came, Saw, Cosplayed
Weekend at Nerdie's.

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BeachBook
* White House Petition: Reject and Ban Taxpayer or Public Funds, Land or Resources From Being Spent on Private Presidential Libraries.

* Goodbye, A Car Discount Muffler & Brake.

* Job Opening: Afghanistan Bureau Chief.

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The Beachwood Tip Line: Chalk 'em up.



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Posted on April 30, 2014


MUSIC - The Week In Chicago Rock.
TV - Cricket vs. Brexit.
POLITICS - Trailer: Swing District.
SPORTS - Ryan Pace's Narratives Are Killing Us.

BOOKS - Chicago For Dummies.

PEOPLE PLACES & THINGS - The Sears Motor Buggy.


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