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The [Wednesday] Papers

I'll be on NBC5 this morning at (ugh!) 6:50 a. m., and then I'll be taking live Internet chat questions until 8. Just go to and you should see what to do.

Upon my return to Beachwood HQ, I'm more likely to do some blogging at Division Street than turn out a Papers column. So visit me there today - but before you do, take a look at Today's Beachwood ->>>

The [Tuesday] Papers
* Use CTA Google Maps to plan your evacuation route!

* I don't think Mayor Daley is in a great position to preach about knowing where your kids are.

* Tribune: "Clinton Hits Hard At Finish"
Sun-Times:"On Eve Of Pa. Primary, A Kinder, Gentler Clinton"

* "Primitive life is very common and intelligent life is fairy rare," Stephen Hawking says. "Some would say it has yet to occur on Earth."

And many have! One of the world's smartest men shows how difficult original comedy is.

* "Hamas Rejects Carter Plan."

Refuses to keep temperature at 68 degrees.

* "Obama outspends Hillary 5-1."

Says he's taking money out of politics - and giving it to ad agencies and TV stations.

* "National City Slashes Dividend."

That's because they've been paying everybody's ATM fees.

* "The Chicago Board Options Exchange reported a 74 percent surge in its first-quarter net income."

Wrigley desecration pays off.

* "Mixed-Income Homes Dedicated Near Cabrini."

To the poor people who used to live there.

* "Dentist Sues, Says He Was Hurt By Benny The Bull's High-Five"

Claims Benny said he would just feel a twinge.

* "Military Allows More Felons To Enlist."

Plan also creates much-needed prison space.

* "Idiots Find Fame In 24/7 YouTube World."

I know! Before the Internet, we never had to suffer through video of people doing stupid things.

That's Stella!
"The question raised by media and some interviewers on the campaign trail that bothers me the most in the battle between Democratic presidential candidates Sen. Barack Obama and Sen. Hillary Clinton: Depending on who wins, will you consider the other for your running mate?

"Who in their right mind would make the person who wanted the No. 1 spot, as the person who has your back (so to speak)? I would think that person really wouldn't mean me any good and would secretly wish me a downfall or a fall from grace! And I certainly wouldn't accept a drink from that individual."

Yes, who in their right mind!

"Another question: Is it just me who thinks that those sex hungry, horny-toad male polygamists are just self-serving and having so many wives is an ego trip?"

It's just you. Nobody else on the planet has ever voiced such a thought.

"Also, the alleged abuse of the children is just sick. Why can't the women (who remind me of the robotic Stepford Wives) have many husbands? The whole polygamy scandal (under the guise of religion) is disturbing. And who's doing those wives' hair?? Yeah, I said it!"

Better than I could.

Push Poll
"Time and time again, commissioned polls or impact studies purport to show one thing when reality is quite another," University of Chicago economist Allen Sanderson writes. "I have yet to see an economic impact study for building a sports facility or convention center, or hosting a major sporting event, that did not promise cornucopias of cash to the city bold enough to "invest" in the scheme. And yet, virtually all convention centers in this country lose money, and revenues spent inside new sports palaces enrich only the owners and leagues.

"If the pattern holds, and it likely will, cities that host Olympic events tend to lose money. These short-term, overly hyped events, as opposed to longer term, well-thought-out urban investments, have low or negative rates of return."


Beachwood Labs takes you inside Chicago 2016's polling.

Secret Sources
On Week in Review last Friday, Sun-Times reporter Andrew Herrmann said Chicago "will be" one of the three or finalists this spring, "sources say."

Emergency Management
"Even from the point that the 600 volts of power was first turned off, 22 minutes elapsed before the CTA notified the city's Office of Emergency Management and Communications, according to the investigation," the Tribune reports. "That was 59 minutes after the emergency began. The Chicago Fire Department's rapid-response team arrived several minutes later to assist passengers out of the tunnel, officials said.

"The electricity was turned off again at 9:10 a.m. to facilitate the evacuation, officials said."

Leggo My Eggo
"Obama initially did little to help counter Clinton's claims that the Illinois senator could not deal with hard questions and difficult issues," the Tribune reports. "As he greeted voters at a diner in Scranton, Obama shrugged off a reporter's question about foreign policy by saying, 'Why can't I just eat my waffle?'"

Progamming Notes
* I'll be on Mark Johnson's BlogTalkRadio show tonight from 8:30 to 9.

* I'm scheduled to appear on the NBC5 morning news show at about 6:50 a.m. on Wednesday to talk about the Pennsylvania primary results. Following that, you can send me questions via the NBC5 website and we'll do a little Internet chatting.

Sex Appeal
The Chicago Young Republicans try it.

The Beachwood Tip Line: Clingy.


Posted on April 23, 2008

MUSIC - Who's Next In Chicago Rap.
TV - Tribune-Nexstar Deal Is Bad News.
POLITICS - Big Soda Hates You.
SPORTS - Harold vs. the Haters.

BOOKS - Wright Brothers, Wrong Story!

PEOPLE PLACES & THINGS - Go Ahead, Eat Raw Cookie Dough!

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