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The [Tuesday] Papers

So on Monday, our host migrated us to a new, presumably better server (a new control panel is involved, too; for those one or two people who might like to know, they have ditched cPanel in favor of DirectAdmin, also known as DA). We had a temporary glitch earlier this morning, but otherwise it appears we have survived the move. Now let's catch up on the news.

Defenestration
In Minneapolis, they are asking: How Did Chicago's Defense Bring The Vikings To A Screeching Halt?

The answer, in part, from Minnesota's point of view:

"Mike Zimmer didn't feel his Vikings offense 'matched their intensity' against a Bears defense that was already entering Sunday with a talent advantage up front.

"The offense's lack of aggressiveness started with quarterback Kirk Cousins, who missed the first of what would be a handful downfield opportunities on the first play of Sunday's 16-6 loss in Chicago . . .

"The Bears' pressure - whether real or perceived by Cousins - was a major factor throughout a game he was sacked five times during the second-half comeback attempt.

"But Cousins' internal clock ticked too quickly from the first snap."

Sounds like he played scared.

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Next up: Coming Off Impressive Win, Raiders Prepare For International Showdown With Chicago Bears.

"The Oakland Raiders made the trip across the pond following Sunday's contest in Indianapolis to battle the Chicago Bears in Week 5 for the NFL's first-ever match-up in the new Tottenham Hotspur Stadium. It will mark the team's second consecutive season playing in London and fifth time playing internationally in the last six years."

Advantage, Raiders? Yes. But not enough to overcome the talent differential.

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Among the "connections" the Raiders' PR office cites between themselves and the Bears:

• Raiders quarterback Mike Glennon spent one season with the Bears in 2017, playing in four games and passing for 833 yards with four touchdowns.

• Bears LB Khalil Mack was selected by the Raiders in the first round (fifth overall) of the 2014 NFL draft and spent four seasons with the club from 2014-17.

• Bears WR/RS Cordarrelle Patterson spent one season with the Raiders in 2017.

• Bears defensive coordinator Chuck Pagano spent two seasons as defensive backs coach for the Raiders from 2005-06.

• Bears K Eddy Pineiro was traded to the Bears in 2019 after originally signing the Raiders as an undrafted free agent in 2018.

Advantage, Bears.

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Given the Bears' lackluster offense and state of the quarterback position, I'm not making any predictions. But I would not want to be a Raiders' offensive player this week. I hope they packed extra pain meds.

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Meanwhile, hard times in Denver for former Bears defensive guru Vic Fangio.

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By the way, "defenestration" doesn't mean what I thought it meant, which was, basically, evisceration.

Merriam-Webster: "a throwing of a person or thing out of a window."

Really? I did not know that.

Second definition: "a usually swift dismissal or expulsion (as from a political party or office)"

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Pat Foley's Deep Thought
I suppose this is like saying a black hockey players looks like he ought to be playing basketball.

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At least he didn't make a Taco Bell joke.

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Makeup Moxie
"The ban of testing makeup on animals in Illinois goes into effect Jan. 1, 2020," Windy City Times reports.

"Illinois is the third state to adopt this law, after California and Nevada. The law bars manufacturers from selling all cosmetic products developed using animal testing, with fines starting at $5,000. Gov. J.B. Pritzker signed the measure into law Aug. 9, 2019."

I guess I missed this back then.

Here's the legislation:

"Amends the Illinois Food, Drug, and Cosmetic Act. Provides that it is unlawful for a manufacturer to import for profit, sell, or offer for sale in this State any cosmetic, if the cosmetic was developed or manufactured using an animal test that was conducted or contracted by the manufacturer, or any supplier of the manufacturer, on or after January 1, 2020. Provides exceptions to the prohibition. Provides that a violation of the Act shall be punishable by an initial fine of $5,000 for the first day of each violation and an additional fine of $1,000 for each day the violation continues. Provides that a violation may be enforced by the State's Attorney of the county in which the violation occurred or by the municipal attorney of the municipality in which the violation occurred. Effective immediately."

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Starving Rock
"You can't hike into Tonti Canyon anymore. The trails are so badly eroded that officials at Starved Rock State Park decided they're unsafe to tread," the La Salle News-Tribune reports.

"Pam Grivetti fears the park's remaining major trails also are on borrowed time. She decided somebody needed to get Springfield's attention and pump some money into the state park - and fast.

"Grivetti is president of the Starved Rock Foundation, and she went on a letter-writing blitz to Springfield. She wants every lawmaker and state agency attached to Starved Rock and Matthiessen state parks to know: Starved Rock is headed for a tipping point and desperately needs help."

The problem is people.

"Starved Rock has, since 2013, drawn attendance figures that rival only the United States' 10 biggest national parks . . . A big finish this year means 15 million people will, cumulatively, have visited Starved Rock over the past five years. And the relentless pairs of feet are subjecting Starved Rock to a level of punishment it cannot withstand - not without upkeep that simply isn't happening."

I did not know Starved Rock was that popular. I'm learning a lot here today!

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Lollapolicia
"A Chicago police commander was demoted after he was accused of allowing Lollapallooza attendees into a restricted area, police officials confirmed Monday," the Tribune reports.

"Darren Doss lost his position as commander of the department's Special Functions unit following an allegation that he improperly authorized civilians to watch the four-day music festival in Grant Park from an elevated observation area where only law enforcement is allowed, said Chicago police spokesman Anthony Guglielmi."

But why did he do it? Was he just being a softie?

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Doss became the commander of special functions in 2017. Prior to that, he was commander of the third district for two years. He has had 16 allegations of wrongdoing lodged against him since he became a Chicago cop in 1990, more than 62 percent of all other CPD officers.

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I wonder which band/s he seemingly let those fans see. Or if he was doing a favor for a kid or kids he knew or was related to.

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From Reddit user inthedollarbin:

"Figures that when a cop is finally punished for something, it's for being too cool."

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Pay 'Em To Play 'Em
"An Illinois state lawmaker thinks college athletes ought to be able to be compensated with cash and he's proposed a new law to allow it," WBBM Newsradio reports.

"State representative Chris Welch's bill would allow college athletes to make money off their likenesses. They'd be allowed to make product endorsements while they're still in school playing their sports."

Welch's bill is identical to one just signed into law by California Gov. Gavin Newsom.

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New on the Beachwood . . .

Big Year For Mosquito Shield
Now operating in Chicago.

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From the Beachwood Sports Desk . . .

The Beachwood Radio Sports Hour #271: Someone Told You So, Repeatedly. It Might Have Been Us
What the Cubs and Trubisky have in common. Including: Maddon's Post; Fixing The Unclutch (Another Word You Could Use Is 'Chokey') Cubs; The White Sox Core Is No Joke; Run, Mitchell, Run; Blackhawks Czech Line: Wendell Carter Jr.'s Rule-Breaking Strip Club Visit; In Other Words, The Fire Have No Shot At The Playoffs; and Red Star Sam Kerr Is A Star.

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Coffman: Don't Hire Grandpa
Too Cutesy Cubbie for his taste.

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The White Sox Season In Verse
Believe it or not, Anderson was the top batter
But the number of errors was a completely different matter

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ChicagoReddit

Did you or somebody you know get punched by a guy driving a Jeep SUV on N Wacker? from r/chicago

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ChicagoGram

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ChicagoTube

Lizzo at the Aragon over the weekend.

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BrooklynVegan has pics and more video.

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BeachBook

Actor Sean Bean Has Died 23 Times On Screen, Announces He Won't Be Doing That Anymore.

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Eat Less Red Meat, Scientists Said. Now Some Believe That Was Bad Advice.

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The Long, Strange Tale Of California's Surf Nazis.

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Harlem.

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TweetWood
A sampling of the delight and disgust you can find @BeachwoodReport.

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The Beachwood Tip Top Tap Line: Repeat after me.



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Posted on October 1, 2019


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