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The [Tuesday] Papers

* * * * * FINAL EDITION * * * * *

(Updates on social media through the evening, of course.)

Election Hay
I'm going to vote and then I'm going to take my money out of the bank, just in case.

Also, I hope this isn't my polling station, but I fear it is:


Logan Square Voting Royally Fucked Up.


Chicago Voter

dryers.jpgAt one of the many Su Nueva Lavanderia, 4314 West Marquette/Jim Young, Reuters

This polling station always makes the lists of America's most peculiar places to vote.

From Fortune in 2012:

Paul Hansen opened his laundromat, Su Nueva Lavanderia, on Marquette Road on Chicago's South Side nine years ago. Not long after that - he remembers it being just a few weeks - the district's alderman asked Hansen whether he'd be interested in cordoning off a piece of his 5,000-square-foot store come Election Day so that people in the neighborhood could vote there. It wasn't so much the call of civic duty that made Hansen say yes: "To be honest, I thought it'd just be good to get people into the place."

A month passed, and the first Tuesday in November arrived. At 5 a.m., just as the Lavanderia opened, election judges came to set up long plastic tables and five voting booths. Hansen gave up an aisle of dryers that day because, he says, the washers make more money.

By 9 p.m., three hours before the laundromat's usual close, the judges finished counting the ballots, folded up the tables, and left. The city paid Hansen $150.

Su Nueva Lavanderia has been a voting site ever since and will be again on Nov. 6, as will a bowling alley, a pool hall, a pet-care store, and several car dealerships in the Windy City. Chicago isn't alone. In Philadelphia a skating rink, a barbershop, a bakery, and an auto repair stand in for polling places; in Los Angeles some voters use lifeguard stands.

There are rules, of course, as to what sort of commercial establishment may be a polling place. The space must be well lit and wheelchair accessible, it can't serve alcohol, and it can't give away anything of value to voters.

James Allen, at the Chicago Board of Election Commissioners, has a favorite polling place - Hot Doug's, a hot dog stand on the North Side. "You've got the scent of steaming Vienna beef wafting through," he says. "I bet a few voters get a dog. But this is Chicago, so hold the ketchup."


I did not know that the now-shuttered Hot Doug's was a polling place.

I do know that Chicago dominates Fortune's 10 Most Peculiar Places To Vote.


The Political Odds
Election Day Edition!


Save Your Vote For Clarence Mudd
Via CHIRP Radio, providing my Election Day soundtrack.


My Voting Experience

1. No lines. Walked right up and got started.

2. Address kerfluey. The guy at the table asked my address after I handed him my voting information mailer with name and address on it. I said 2326 North Milwaukee Avenue. He raised an eyebrow as he looked up at me. "Or 2328!" I said, because I always get mixed up. He looked at me again. See, my registration is at 2320 North Milwaukee Avenue, which is my mailing address. I get my mail at the restaurant downstairs. That's 2320. My actual door, though, is at 2328, but I get mixed up a lot and can't remember if it's 2328 or 2326. I explained enough about living above a restaurant and such, and they let me continue. Whew!

3. "Paper or touchscreen?" I didn't know we got a choice! I panicked! Um . . . as my brain spun trying to think about what the difference might be. "Whatever works best for you!" I said. After the address thing, I was spooked! So the dude chose paper for me.

4. "Would you like a constitutional ballot?" Um, what? "It's your choice, here's the regular ballot and then here's the constitutional ballot." See, that was the ballot with the constitutional questions on it. I'm pretty sure you're supposed to just hand both ballots to folks, but I overheard the guy asking each voter like it was a secondary optional ballot. A constitutional ballot. Like the other was an unconstitutional ballot. I wonder how many people were confused by that.

5. As I filled out my ballot, I had to resist the overwhelming urge to write commentary on it. I know that would have "spoiled" my ballot, but I was close! So I propose ballots come with space for commentary. That would help us all say what we'd really like to say while voting.


Photo Gallery





I traditionally get an election donut from Dunkin' Donuts on Election Day, but I'm boycotting my Dunkin' Donuts because every time I go in there I have a problem. So I went to 7-11 and got the sprinklicious donut instead - and how could I resist the Cubs cookie?



The Beachwood Tronc Line: Provisional.


Posted on November 8, 2016

MUSIC - Chief Keef Changed The Industry.
TV - Vizio's Best Product Is You.
POLITICS - UIC: Soda Taxes Work.
SPORTS - More McCaskey Malpractice.

BOOKS - All About Poop.


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