The [Tuesday] Papers
With Rod Blagojevich set to take the stand this morning for his third day of testimony in his corruption trial, our very own Ed Hammer indulges in a look ahead to his likely future:
"As the convicted Blagojevich arrives at the federal prison in Terre Haute, the pent-up and hostile murderers, drug dealers and con men jeer and sneer him and the other fresh meat," he writes in The Terre Haute Redemption. "Like Red, George Ryan, who loved the casinos on the outside, bets cigarettes and money with the other inmates on how long before the new kid with the Justin Bieber haircut would last before he cries.
"Unsympathetic, Ryan gives him until his first meal. Ryan loses the bet. Blagojevich makes it through the first night without even a whimper. In a scornful baritone, Ryan remarks, 'I'll have to admit, I didn't think much of Rod the first time I saw him, but his first night in the joint, Rod Blagojevich cost me two packs of cigarettes. He never made a sound.'"
P.S. And Then He Blew His Brains Out
"The Ernest Hemingway Foundation of Oak Park, which manages a Hemingway museum, runs tours of his birthplace home and hosts a variety of Hemingway events, is allowing the event to pass without note.
"So is the Hemingway Society, which organizes international conferences and awards the annual PEN/Hemingway Award for fiction. Other Hemingway organizations - from Key West to northern Michigan and from Boston to Idaho - have taken the same approach.
"'We don't consider that a particularly big event for any number of reasons,' said Allan Baldwin, former chairman of the Oak Park foundation."
Step 1: Announce you are going to reshape blizzard strategy.
See also: The Deadspin Guide To The New ESPN Book.
Little Ventured, Gained
So can the self-congratulations this city likes so much to indulge in. The dealmaking environment is hardly vibrant; neither is its tech sector nor its (vaunted in some corners)
This is Chicago, not Des Moines. We're supposed to rank in the top three of just about everything - and not be surprised and overexuberant about it.
The Chicago Housing Authority still has tenants?
In prison he'll be known as Connie.
Who says they were just dressed that way?
I thought we were still in the first dip . . .
Or do they mean Quade strain?
See also: Cubs Anonymous.
The Weekend In Chicago Rock
Land of Oz
The Beachwood Tip Line: Strong as oak.
Posted on May 31, 2011
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