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A discount-store employee is time-warped to a medieval castle, where he is the foretold savior who can dispel the evil there. Unfortunately, he screws up and releases an army of skeletons. (tvguide.com)
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The [Thursday] Papers

"Across the globe, the coronavirus pandemic is affecting almost all aspects of daily life. Travel is down; jobless claims are up; and small businesses are struggling.

"But not all businesses are experiencing a downturn. The world's largest pornography website, Pornhub, has reported large increases in traffic - for instance, seeing an 18% jump over normal numbers after making its premium content free for 30 days for people who agree to stay home and wash their hands frequently. In many regions, these spikes in use have occurred immediately after social distancing measures have been implemented."

Yes, wash your hands.

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"In the midst of the COVID-19 epidemic, it has become easier to buy alcohol than toilet paper or eggs.

"Across the U.S., governors are terming alcohol sales an essential business and loosening restrictions to permit home delivery and carryout cocktails, throwing an economic lifeline to one group of small businesses.

"Are alcohol sales actually essential? According to the federal government, just over half of Americans age 18 and above (55.3%) drank alcohol in the past 30 days; just over a quarter binged - more than four drinks on an occasion for women, or five for men - and 1 in 17 (5
or five for men - had an alcohol use disorder, ranging from mild to severe.

"For those in this latter group who are actually dependent on it, alcohol may indeed be essential."

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Chicago Doctors Noticing Bump In Injuries From People Cooking, Exercising At Home During The Coronavirus.

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IDES Of April
"Gig workers and other self-employed, independent contractors in Illinois cannot look forward to getting unemployment checks anytime soon - despite a new federal law intended to help them out financially," WBEZ reports.

"The $2 trillion federal stimulus bill that was approved on March 27 cleared the way to expand jobless benefits to many workers who had not previously been eligible, including the vast ranks of drivers for Uber, Lyft and other ride-share apps.

"But nearly two weeks later, the officials who run the unemployment system for Illinois have not come up with a process to accept applications from such workers, much less get the promised money into their pockets."

At least porn is free for 30 days.

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Mayor Mom
"Mayor Lori Lightfoot drove around Chicago during the nice weather Tuesday, yelling at people to go home whenever she saw crowds," Block Club Chicago reports.

This is something I'd like to see. She should wear a body cam.

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Peter Meter
"Long before Peter Navarro's feud with infectious disease expert Dr. Anthony Fauci over a possible treatment for coronavirus, the White House trade adviser had a reputation as a political wrecking ball in California - where he ran in a handful of races as a liberal Democrat," Politico reports.

The combative and cocksure approach that mark his arguments for the use of the malaria drug hydroxychloroquine are familiar to California Democrats who assisted Navarro's early political forays in Southern California, when he unsuccessfully ran for office in San Diego five times between 1992 and 2001.

Back then, they recall, Navarro's temper and ego often proved to be his undoing in campaigns where he literally stood alongside Hillary Clinton, railed against then-House Speaker Newt Gingrich as the personification of political evil and positioned himself as a "strong environmentalist and a progressive on social issues such as choice, gay rights, and religious freedom.''

Larry Remer, a veteran Democratic political consultant who ran two of Navarro's campaigns, describes his former client as "the biggest asshole I've ever known.''

Sure, but have you met his boss?

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New on the Beachwood today . . .

Illinois Coronavirus Inbox
Jeffrey Pendleton did not have to die, for one thing.

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The Jesus Myth
"[E]xposing the errors, inconsistencies, and absurdities that run through the Bible's conflicting accounts of the life and deeds of a revolutionary and, ultimately, fictional figure."

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John Prine In The Beachwood
Not John Hiatt.

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How China's State-Owned Media Is Covering The Coronavirus From Chicago
See CGTN's reports.

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FIFA Still Super Corrupt
21st Century Fox, too.

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ChicagoReddit

Is Your Apartment Noise Isolated? from r/chicago

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ChicagoGram

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ChicagoTube

King Von (Grandson Of David Barksdale) Could Be Chicago's Next.

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BeachBook

Quarantined Couple Builds Art Museum To Entertain Pet Gerbils.

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TweetWood
A sampling of the delight and disgust you can find @BeachwoodReport.

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The Beachwood Q-Tip Line: Lock. Them. Up.



Permalink

Posted on April 9, 2020


MUSIC - This Summer's Soundtrack Started Here.
TV - M*A*S*H Theme Song's Weird History.
POLITICS - SCOTUS Blesses Church + State.
SPORTS - Tip Your Cap To The Negro Leagues.

BOOKS - The Legacy Of Racism For Children.

PEOPLE PLACES & THINGS - The Chagall Windows.


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