The [Thursday] Papers

For completists, there was no column on Wednesday. Sorry, distractions this week.

"Chicago will hire 20 more food inspectors and three more supervisors to bolster a restaurant inspection team so 'seriously understaffed,' it has undermined public trust and jeopardized state funding, Inspector General Joe Ferguson said Wednesday.

"After auditing 2015 inspections, Ferguson concluded last fall that the city's Department of Public Health Department was falling so far short of state mandates, it would need to hire 56 additional food inspectors to catch up."

So, um, won't that still leave Chicago 36 inspectors short?

Will there be 36 restaurants we shouldn't go to?

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"On Wednesday, Ferguson released a 'follow-up inquiry' that should reassure skittish foodies in a city just voted the nation's best restaurant city by Bon Appetit."

Um, I'm kind of left more skittish.

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Also, why is the inspector general announcing this instead of City Hall?

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From last November:

"Less than 44 percent of Chicago restaurants and 24.8 percent of bars are being inspected as often as state law requires - undermining public trust and jeopardizing state funding - because the city's Department of Public Health is 'seriously understaffed,' Inspector General Joe Ferguson has concluded."

So more than half of the city's restaurants have been going uninspected?

Assignment Desk: use data to determine which restaurants those are!

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Field Notes
Meanwhile . . .

Food sold at Wrigley Field rated eighth safest among 28 baseball stadiums reviewed in a Sports Illustrated study.

SI analyzed health department inspection records and other data to determine which ballparks have the safest concessions.

Wrigley's most recent inspections turned up 36 total violations and eight critical violations, which pose the highest safety risk to fans.

SI noted: "The critical issues involved either foods at improper temperatures . . . or improper rodent- and insect-proofing measures on kitchen doors. No rodent activity was observed. Inspectors did ultimately dispose of 25 pounds of food."

The White Sox's Guaranteed Rate Field, ranked 18th, had 28 critical violations, according to Sports Illustrated's findings.

"Dozens of mice droppings in multiple locations? Flies under prep tables? The mid-June inspection at Guaranteed Rate Field revealed a plethora of violations - many critical - in Chicago."

I'm sure there's a rebuilding joke in there somewhere, but I'm also sure it's not really a very funny one.

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Also, I would've led with the Guaranteed Rat - I mean Rate - findings.

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Here's the Sun-Times' version of the story.

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Good Luck, Dayton
"Parts of Main Street in downtown Dayton may start to look more like they belong in downtown Chicago following a series of sidewalk and streetscape upgrades," the Dayton Daily News hallucinates.

"The city of Dayton will be improving the sidewalk along Main Street between Fourth and Fifth streets, as well as a perpendicular stretch of Fourth Street, bordering Dave Hall Plaza.

"The plan is to remake Main Street to be more like Chicago's famous section of North Michigan Avenue, called the 'Magnificent Mile.'"

Dayton: City of Dreams.

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As long as I'm on the Dayton Daily News site . . .

"Dayton Education Association members will vote on a tentative agreement with Dayton Public Schools today following 18 hours of talks that ended early Thursday."

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Our Brand
"When you think of gun violence, you think of black boys in Chicago."

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BeachBook

Anne Frank Center Lists 'Alarming Parallels' Between Trump And Hitler's Germany.

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Tomasulo's Classic On The Olympics.

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TweetWood
A sampling.

Every time school funding is debated, there's a moment where it becomes clear that some people just can't believe poor people are poor. https://t.co/8h630c3307

— NPR IL EducationDesk (@WUISEdDesk) August 9, 2017

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Thanks, Rep. Jeanne Ives, but as a "reporter out there listening," I'm not confused by the #SB1 formula, bc I attended commission meetings.

— dusty rhodes 📻🎙🐝 (@dustyrhodes919) August 9, 2017

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No photos allowed. God forbid other teams learn all the Bears' awesome secret plays.

#Bears WR Tanner Gentry made a one-handed touchdown catch at training camp today. No photos allowed, so artist rendering pic.twitter.com/rUKTaCUQ3k

— Patrick Finley (@patrickfinley) August 8, 2017

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The Beachwood Tronc Line: Shine on.

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