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The [Thursday] Papers

"Chicago elevator inspectors failed to complete more than three-quarters of their required annual inspections last year, resulting in about $772,040 in lost inspection fees, according to an audit released Wednesday by the city's Office of Inspector General," the Tribune reports.

"This is a program that has had a long, chronic history of performance deficits," said Inspector General Joseph Ferguson. "Our audit shows that they are not meeting their own standards necessary to ensure the safety of elevators citywide."

Think of the children, Rahm. Think of the children.


It's always funny 'til someone gets hurt.


Chicago's elevators vs. Chicago's El. Discuss.

Ald. Scareston
"Cook County prosecutors are investigating a longtime South Side alderman who offered raffle tickets to people who vote in next week's election, a move the alderman on Wednesday conceded was wrong," the Tribune reports.

"In a Facebook posting that has since been removed, 5th Ward Ald. Leslie Hairston offered a raffle ticket - with the chance to win multiple prizes of gift certificates from local stores - to anyone who brought a voting receipt to her office."

Was one of the prizes an "I Voted" sticker?


"The state's attorney's election fraud unit has opened an investigation and is looking into the matter," spokesperson Sally Daly told the Trib.

"State election law states that anyone who promises money 'or other valuable consideration' to anyone to vote, register to vote or influence their vote "shall be guilty of a class 4 felony."

Huh. Isn't every politician offering "valuable consideration" to anyone who votes? And some more valuable consideration than others?


"'I'm owning it,' Hairston said when asked about the offer. The alderman's admission came a day after FOX-32 TV news broadcast a story about the posting.

"Hairston said she was awaiting a response from the Chicago Board of Election Commissioners on the propriety of the offer when it was posted on Facebook. 'I didn't wait for the official word before posting,' Hairston said when asked if she had done anything wrong."

I tend to like Hairston and can hardly get exercised about this. So I won't bust her here for cutting unusually inquisitive reporters short saying "I'm done."

I would, however, like to know how long it was taking the election board to issue their ruling.

"Lance Gough, the executive director of the city elections board, did receive a call from Hairston asking about the propriety of the offer, said Jim Allen, the agency's spokesman. Hairston was told the board could not offer advice and was referred to the state's attorney's office, he said."


Well, I guess the state's attorney's office will issue a ruling soon.


Can the state's attorney's office investigate the Sun-Times while it's at it? A fraud has been perpetrated upon the people.


Speak of the devil . . .

"After voting early on Wednesday, Mayor Rahm Emanuel was asked whether voters should be offered prizes to boost turnout," the Sun-Times reports.

Really? Who the fuck asked him that?

"'Here's what I think: The reward is, you participate in a democracy. That's what comes with being a citizen and a responsible citizenship. And that's our requirement,' the mayor said."

Just as the question wasn't worth asking, the answer wasn't worth publishing.

"Asked whether he's worried that voters may be 'turned off' by the negative tone of the governor's race, Emanuel said, 'I know that the Democrats are doing an effective job of reminding people what's at stake. That's why I voted Yes on the minimum wage.'"

And neither was that.

And why is that tacked on to an article about Hairston's get-out-the-vote raffle? Because it's Fran Spielman, who probably did the asking but conceals that from readers, as if the questions came from God, and it's just another legacy newspaper still stuck in the mud of legacy story structures.


Faces Of The Child Migrant Crisis
Coming to the Daley Center.

The Blue & Orange Kool-Aid Report: Bye-Curious
Yada, yada, yada, ACL tear.


* Wallenda TV Exec: Contingency Plans In Case Of 'Failure.'

* 'Operation' Inventor Needs Operation.


A sampling.








The Beachwood Tip Line: Fired up.


Posted on October 30, 2014

MUSIC - Chief Keef Changed The Industry.
TV - Vizio's Best Product Is You.
POLITICS - UIC: Soda Taxes Work.
SPORTS - More McCaskey Malpractice.

BOOKS - All About Poop.


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