The [Thursday] Papers

Rahm Emanuel, anti-Semite:

"The mayor-elect spent a half hour Monday evening charming the alderman and the rest of the crowd with his usual mix of self-deprecating humor and policy chatter," the Reader reports. "He got everyone laughing with jokes about taking his parents to dinner ('These are Jewish parents - you've got to get used to that. My father just wants to know who's paying before he picks out a place . . . ')."

Because money-obsessed Jews are, you know, tight with a dollar.

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Rahm Emanuel, confused:

"Mayor-elect Rahm Emanuel suggested to a theater full of arts patrons Wednesday that he would look into whether nonprofit institutions will have to start paying property taxes under his administration," the Tribune reports.

"Later, however, an Emanuel transition aide clarified that the incoming mayor is not considering raising taxes on nonprofits, saying the option isn't on the table."

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Rahm Emanuel, Trump's guy:

"Trump donated $50,000 to Rahm Emanuel's mayoral bid."

Will he return the money?

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Rahm Emanuel, media master:

"Rahm Emanuel is a Windy City guy. So when the mayor-elect makes his way back to Washington for the White House Correspondents' Dinner this weekend, he'll be going with a Chicago media outlet, of course," Politico reports.

"Emanuel will sit at the Chicago Tribune table, along with Ben LaBolt, his campaign spokesman (and former White House assistant press secretary) who will serve as press secretary for the Obama reelection campaign in Chicago."

I suppose it would make for an uncomfortable dinner for the Trib to call out Rahm for his anti-Semitic remark, so they'll just let it pass. It's not like Louis Farrakhan said it or anything.

Rubber Stamp Media
Journalists are supposed to operate under frameworks independent of spinmeisters, pols or corporate power. The standards and guidelines for those frameworks are little things like the law, the rules, the ordinances, stated purposes and basic pillars of democracy and decency.

But here in Chicago, even as they call for a more independent city council, the media accepts the frameworks dictated to them by our cynical officeholders.

As Mick Dumke points out for the Reader:

"Lots has been written about the skirmishes between mayor-elect Rahm Emanuel and City Council dean Ed Burke as they vie for power in the post-Daley world. But lost in the speculation over whether Emanuel will choose to keep Burke as finance committee chairman is the fact that it's not supposed to be his decision to make.

"Under the council's own rules, the number, responsibilities, and makeup of committees are the responsibility of the aldermen themselves: 'The membership of Aldermen on standing committees, and the Chairman and Vice-Chairman of such committees, shall be determined by the City Council by resolution duly adopted.'"

No city council can be considered independent if it lets the mayor choose its committee chairmen.

And no news organization can be considered competent if it fails to point that out.

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Similarly, the Chicago media doesn't seem bothered at all that - once again - the search for a new police chief is being conducted secretly by the (incoming) mayor, rendering the police board process moot.

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"Emanuel keeps saying that he doesn't want a rubber-stamp council - he wants aldermen who will be 'partners.' But he was vague about what that will mean in the committee reshaping process.

"He said it is 'technically correct' that committee assignments are the job of aldermen. He added: 'I will have a view on it and I will present my view and obviously the City Council will have their role.'"

Rahm Emanuel, liar.

One Happy Family
"Former battling pols Joe Berrios and Forrest Claypool, who ran for Cook County assessor (Berrios won), were spotted dining on harmony and grist at Petros Monday morning," a "source" called into Sneed.

That would be the Forrest Claypool whom Rahm just named to lead the CTA because they are old friends and Forrest needed a job after losing the county assessor's race to Berrios.

How soon they forget:

"Forrest Claypool, the independent candidate for assessor, launched JoeBerrios.com, a website with the name of his Democratic opponent. And as you might imagine, it's not the most flattering depiction.

"The page quotes the Better Government Association, describing Joe Berrios as 'pay-to-play personified.' It recounts Berrios, in his role at the Board of Review, taking campaign donations from tax appeals attorneys, and giving tax breaks to their clients in exchange."

Curiously, JoeBerrios.com now redirects here.

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If Sneed was a real reporter she would've asked who bought.

Beachwood Birth Certificate Tweets
From @BeachwoodReport.

Trump Hotel Presidential Suite now comes with complimentary fruitcake. #birthcertificates #Trump

New #Trump Hotel policy: U can check in anytime u like, but u can't leave without showing a long-form birth certificate. #birthcertificates

Lady Gaga releases birth certificate; she really was born that way. #gaga #birthcertificates

Dick Cheney releases birth certificate; proves he is a born liar. #cheney #birthcertificates

Richard M. Daley releases birth certificate; was delivered by two patronage storks plus a supervisor. #daley #birthcertificates

Rahm releases birth certificate; was born purely out of ambition. #rahm #birthcertificates

Obama releases political birth certificate; proud son of Tony Rezko and Emil Jones. #obama #birthcertificates

Bill Daley releases birth certificate; wasn't fully born until JP Morgan consummated deal with Chase. #blago #birthcertificates

Blago releases birth certificate; was delivered after long-winded labor. #blago #birthcertificates

Dick Durbin Hates The Internet
Jesse Jackson Jr. no prize, either.

Goodbye Empire Man
A compendium.

Meet Keenan Cahill
Chicago's Teenage Lip-Synching YouTube Sensation Who Also Has A Rare Genetic Disorder.

Not Dead Yet!
Repurposing books for the digital age.

Carl's Cubs Mailbag
Cold cuts and shark butts.

Remembering Lacy Gibson
A Chicago master and his gospel-tinged hillbilly jazz blues guitar.

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