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The [Monday] Papers

"The Chicago Cubs are apologizing for long bathroom lines, even by Wrigley Field standards, at the team's home opener Sunday night," the Tribune reports.

"Opening Day at Wrigley Field has always brought challenges with wait times and tonight was particularly extreme," Cubs spokesman Julian Green said in a statement after the game.

Two bathrooms in the upper deck "went down temporarily" and forced fans downstairs "where we already were experiencing issues with long wait times," Green said.

The statement did not say why the bathrooms were closed and Green could not be reached Monday morning.

When you release a statement - filled with corporate-speak that doesn't seem to grasp the enormity of the problem - you don't care about your customers at all.

And that's pretty thin reporting on the part of the Trib.

By contrast, check out Deadspin's "'An Absolute Shit Show:' Tales From The Wrigley Field Bathroom Lines."

And, as always, @BeachwoodReport.

The Beachwood Radio Sports Hour #45: The Kris Bryant Pundit Trap
The Chicago sports media is congratulating Theo Epstein for lying to their faces - or getting the story horribly wrong. Which is it, guys?

The Beachwood Radio Hour #51: Re-Electing Rahm
Talk about a shitshow. The enthusiasm is with Chuy, but the numbers are with Mayor Evil.

Plus: Political Journalism Can't Compete With Political Advertising; Poor Phil Ponce; Rahm's "Bs" Are B.S.; Secret Sacks; The Kris Bryant Pundit Trap; and Rahm's Tyrannical Mandate.

SportsMonday: All Jumbotron, No Cattle
Giant scoreboard not as much fun when there are no highlights to show.

The White Sox Report
"Players come and go," our very own Roger Wallenstein writes.

"In a sense, they are incidental - many are easily forgotten - in comparison to the loyalty and dedication of the core of fans who certainly recognize the talent (or lack thereof) of the current team. That glimmer of optimism that this season will be more successful than the previous few is addictive along with the overall appeal of what Babe Ruth called 'the greatest game in the world.'

"Perhaps the players should be asking the fans for autographs. The people whose unquestioned presence season after season represent not only themselves but past generations Sox fans. They truly are the fiber and spirit of the franchise. Or how about the vendors, some of whom are in their 60s having started hawking when they were teenagers, signing an autograph for some of the athletes who are new to town and may be here only for a brief moment?

"Of course, what makes people like Jose Abreu, Sale and Alexei Ramirez so special is their unique talent, which none of us share. They are not the one percent. They are far more elite than that. They're the precious few on the planet who have the ability to hit a baseball 400 feet or throw one 95 miles an hour."

* Everyone's Incomes Went Down Last Year Except The Richest.

* Peter Singer On The Ethics Of Philanthropy.

* Missouri Defense Lawyers Also Judges, Prosecutors.

* Wells Students Stuck With 'Pitiful Concrete Jungle' After Field Plan Stalls.

* Joakim Noah Will Always Be There To Shit-Talk LeBron James.


A sampling.



Totally glossed over: Rahm admitted in last week's debate - The Phil Ponce Debate - that he had not met with residents about airplane noise, just seconds after repeating the claim, which he also made in the previous debate. In fact, Rahm has rejected more than a dozen meeting requests from residents.


That's in response to this.


Yes. Yes he did.




The Beachwood Tip Line: Pardon their dust.


Posted on April 6, 2015

MUSIC - Chief Keef Changed The Industry.
TV - Vizio's Best Product Is You.
POLITICS - UIC: Soda Taxes Work.
SPORTS - More McCaskey Malpractice.

BOOKS - All About Poop.


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