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The [Monday] Papers

BREAKING 3:05 P.M.: Reports say Roland Burris has been accepted by the U.S. Senate.

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I'm already desperately behind this week. Damn you, Blagojevich!

Here are a few appetizers, the rest of the column will follow shortly.

* Putting Blago To The Test.

* The Many Moods of Dick Durbin.

* The Oldest Established Really Important Film Club opens its discussion about The True Meaning of Pictures at Ferdy on Films today.

* Two weeks in and parking meter rates haven't changed yet.

* "Leo Burnett's $15.5 million payment to the U.S. Army to settle over-billing claims last week puts the matter to rest legally, but still stirs up issues for the agency's increasingly urgent pursuit of major new-business wins," Ad Age reports.

* Ominous tidings for the Blackhawks? Find out in Jim Coffman's SportsMonday.

* "Hobbled, humbled, humiliated," J.J. Tindall writes in My New Job." I'm a highly-motivated self-starter and a great team player who thrives on a challenge."

The Daley Show
"Novak's investigation revealed internal memo after intermal memo showing City Hall knew full well that the Christian Industrial League couldn't raise enough money to support the building it wanted to build in North Lawndale, a $25 million state-of-the art shelter," Carol Marin writes.

"'There has been a persistent funding gap of $5 to $6 million,' Planning Commissioner Alicia Mazur Berg wrote to the mayor in 2002."

Yet, the mayor went ahead with a plan that moved the shelter to a space it couldn't afford so Daley pal Michael Marchese could build expensive condos; not only that, but the shelter was used in a tax manuever that saved Marchese $4.2 million.

Rolanderia
"Burris not a crook, but he is a willing accomplice in a tainted process," Roger Simon writes.

*

Simon is also one of many to float this idea:

"Maybe if the Senate drags things out long enough, Blagojevich - who was impeached by the Illinois House on Friday - will be removed from office. That way the lieutenant governor of Illinois would take over, and he could make his own appointment to the Senate."

I don't understand this line of reasoning. How could any action deemed legal taken by Blago while still in office be rendered moot once he leaves? Why would Pat Quinn then get to make this decision? Isn't it too late?

Burris Bag
"Burris also made three consecutive unsuccessful runs for the Democratic nomination for governor - 1994, 1998 and 2002," the Tribune reports. "After losing the March 1994 primary, he declared "Roland Burris' illustrious political career will soon come to an end'."

BURRIS TO BE SEATED IN U.S. SENATE
* August chamber accepts fake ID, tells him to go sit in the corner and mind his own business and if the cops come around asking questions, they never met.

* Will be assigned to the new Special Senate Subcommittee on the Paperwork Reduction Act and told to report back in two years.

* Association of Late-Nite Comics: "Looks like we'll have Roland Burris to kick around for two more years!"

* Burris assigned to office near the boiler in the basement while Obama's old office is preserved in shrink-wrap and formaldehyde.

* As part of deal, Harry Reid gives Burris unlimited credit at the Wynn and tells him to take some time off.

* Bobby Rush spotted chiseling a new line into Burris's mausoleum: "First African American appointed by an impeached governor to the position of junior U.S. Senator from Illinois."

* Burris announces his first official act as a U.S. Senator will be to hold a fundraiser for Gov. Rod Blagojevich.

* Second official act will be to put Rolando Cruz back on Death Row.

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The Chicago Snow Queen

The payoff is really at the end, though.

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The Beachwood Tip Line: Trailblazing.



Permalink

Posted on January 12, 2009


MUSIC - PJ Harvey Wins Pitchfork.
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BOOKS - Trump's True Believers.

PEOPLE PLACES & THINGS - Land After Frac Sand.


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