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The [Christmas Week] Papers

Tonight's the night!

As the story goes, Santa Bob travels the world delivering gifts to bartenders worldwide and is so phantasmagorically superlative that he makes it back to the Beachwood Inn to pull his regular Friday night shift.

Or maybe when Bob goes into the secret back room he's really leaving on another trip and - due to his special powers - makes it back before the next customer orders an Old Style.

All I know is that I'll be working as Bob's First Elf tonight fetching brewskis and making sure the jukebox is operating at peak efficiency. Stop in and join us.

Plus, you never know who you'll run into. Last night, for example, "Jerome Haller" of I Am A Security Guard made his first Beachwood appearance. He wasn't even in disguise.


Some photos of our holiday ambience below, but first we have a relatively full Beachwood today.

* The Week in WTF: Rahm is in, Meeks is out, Ryan is "in" and the FOP is out of its mind.

* The Blue & Orange Kool-Aid Report: Brett Favre's Former Team Will Face Bears Without Him.

* This Weekend on CAN TV: Democracy at home and abroad. Plus, the South Shore Drill Team.

* This Week in Comic Books: Obama, Palin, Archie and The Vork.

* Beachwood Christmas Carols! For the political set.

From @BeachwoodReport:

* Breaking! #Rahm signs endorsement deal with Boxes 'R Us.

* Breaking! #Rahm allowed to stay on ballot as long as he spends the rest of the campaign in his crawl space.

* Breaking! #Rahm allowed to stay on ballot as long as he vows not to hold a post-election summit at Manny's or the Billy Goat.

* Breaking! #Rahm allowed to stay on ballot if he memorizes the entire Bears roster before Sunday.

* Breaking! #Rahm allowed to stay on ballot as long as he agrees not to bite the heads off birds or small children.


Previously this week . . .


* I Am A Security Guard: 10 Degress And Topless.

* The Czar of the Playbook Preview: Jets at Bears.

* Remembering Steve Landesberg, AKA Detective Arthur Dietrich. Our kind of cop.

* New fun facts about The Fixx, Iron Maiden and more in Trivial Pursuit.


* George Ryan Gets The Cold Justice He Deserves

* Fantasy Fix: Sexy Rexy?


As noted yesterday, we're in holiday mode here at Beachwood HQ. That means the Beachwood elves are feverishly putting the final touches on gifts for the naughty and nice while Beachwood Santa and the rest of us sporadically post alcohol-riven ramblings of our wayward staff and I pull some holiday shifts at the Inn to make some money for daddy.

* Bears Eke Out A Win. Get lucky again.

* The College Football Report: Beef 'O' Brady's Smokin Jack Slider Basket And The Rest Of This Week's Bowl Games Preview As Well As Part 1 Of Our Season Recap


* The [Monday] Papers: Michael Scott's Olympic Fix

Room at the Inn
Apologies for the poor quality; taken with my crappy-ass Motorola cell phone.


By the light of the jukebox and the blue stars in the night . . .



Pigs with holiday hats.



The Beachwood Christmas tree.



One of Santa's reindeer stops in for a drink.



Stockings hung with care.



The King of Beers.



From us to you - and that includes atheists, agnostics, Jews, Muslims, Pagans etc. etc. We just mean generically.



The Beachwood Tip Line: Naughty and nice-ish.


Posted on December 24, 2010

MUSIC - Holiday Hullabaloo.
POLITICS - Bank Profits Soaring.
SPORTS - Chicago vs. Michigan, 1903.

BOOKS - Dia De Los Muertos Stories.

PEOPLE PLACES & THINGS - Chicagoetry: West Town Blues.

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